Some people think that detailed description of crime scenes in newspapers and on TV can have a bad influence on the public, so this kind of information should be restricted in the media. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

These days,
crime
rates have been increasing rapidly more than ever before
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
around the world some believe that the public can
influence
Wrong verb form
be influenced
show examples
by watching and reading
crime
scenes
from
Change preposition
on
show examples
TV
and
Change preposition
in newspaper
show examples
newspaper
Fix the agreement mistake
newspapers
show examples
, so
these kinds
Fix the agreement mistake
this kind
show examples
of information should be prohibited in the media, I firmly disagree with
this
statement, I will address why I oppose
this
statement for the following reasons. To commence with, people do not
influence
badly when they watch
crime
scenes
on
TV
because these
medias
Correct your spelling
media
show examples
can create more
awarness
Correct your spelling
awareness
to
Change preposition
in
show examples
the population to prevent and be aware before any
crime
happens.
This
means numerous culprits act
a
Correct your spelling
as
show examples
normal
person
Fix the agreement mistake
people
show examples
before doing
offence
Correct article usage
an offence
show examples
so
these information
Change the determiner
this information
show examples
can help to smell criminals and their real intentions;
these knowledge
Change the determiner
this knowledge
show examples
only
individual
Fix the agreement mistake
individuals
show examples
learn from watching
crime
scenes
on
TV
.
For example
, many detective shows are telecasted in prime media,
there
Correct pronoun usage
They
show examples
are based on
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
real
crime
Fix the agreement mistake
crimes
show examples
and how police catch them and
dedives how
Verb problem
discover
show examples
the way
solve
Fix the infinitive
to solve
show examples
the
mistery
Correct your spelling
mystery
offence: everything
detaily explian
Correct your spelling
detail explained
by the detective, and
as a result
, people will be more aware to stop any
crime
occurs.
Hence
, these
crime
scenes
never
influenced
Wrong verb form
influence
show examples
badly
instead
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
it
Correct pronoun usage
they
show examples
creates
Correct subject-verb agreement
create
show examples
more protection.
Furthermore
, newspaper's
crime
scener
Correct your spelling
scene
show examples
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
our surrounding place how affected by
toffender
Correct your spelling
the offender
when they
do
Verb problem
commit
show examples
any offence.
This
means these news
are providing
Wrong verb form
provide
show examples
details about
culprit's
Correct article usage
the culprit's
show examples
different ideas and how they manipulate persons to use them for
crime
.
For instance
, it describes
crime
how, when, who,
why
Correct word choice
and why
show examples
happens compled with they
show
Correct subject-verb agreement
shows
show examples
culprit's
Correct article usage
the culprit's
show examples
identity, so mankind will be more aware
any
Change preposition
of any
show examples
incidents before
happens
Correct subject-verb agreement
happen
show examples
. The more precise,
these medial information
Change the determiner
this medial information
show examples
about
crime
,
this
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
leads to
avoid
Change the verb form
avoiding
show examples
being victims of any
crime
. Henceforth,
this
not
Add a missing verb
does not
show examples
influence
badly to the public rather than
create
Correct subject-verb agreement
creates
show examples
awareness. In conclusion,
TV
and
newspaper
Fix the agreement mistake
newspapers
show examples
do not create bad.
influence
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the population when they telecast about mankind stay far
crime
scenes
because it creates more
awarness
Correct your spelling
awareness
to away from offenders
as well as
it avoids being victims of
crime
in real life.
Therefore
, I firmly disagree with
this
statement and I hope
this
certainly brings more benefits to society.
Submitted by reanudeepan on

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task achievement
The essay addresses the prompt but there are areas that lack clarity and coherence. Improve your introduction by clearly outlining the points that you will discuss in the essay.
coherence cohesion
The paragraphs should have a more logical structure where each point is clearly introduced, developed, and concluded. Make sure you have clear topic sentences for each paragraph.
coherence cohesion
Your ideas are clear, but the language and structure can be improved for better comprehension. Make sure to avoid redundant phrases and complex sentence structures that can confuse the reader.
task achievement
Try to provide more detailed and specific examples to support your points. This will make your argument stronger.
coherence cohesion
Review and refine your conclusion to ensure that it effectively summarizes the main points and clearly states your final position on the issue.
task achievement
You have provided a clear position on the issue and maintained this stance throughout the essay.
task achievement
Your essay includes multiple points to support your argument, which demonstrates an effort to address the prompt comprehensively.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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You are not ready for IELTS Speaking, if you

  • Can’t speak smoothly without pauses.
  • Use simple words and lack vocabulary.
  • Feel nervous and anxious when speaking.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Graphic content
  • Desensitization
  • Sensationalism
  • Ethical reporting
  • Media watchdog
  • Copycat crimes
  • Public perception
  • Law enforcement
  • Freedom of press
  • Informed citizenry
What to do next:
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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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