IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Social media has many positive uses, but there have been some negative consequences to it as well. Identify a problem caused by social media and describe the solutions you would propose to address this problem.

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Using social
network
Fix the agreement mistake
networks
show examples
 has
a advantages
Correct the article-noun agreement
an advantage
advantages
show examples
 when it
Use synonyms
use
Wrong verb form
is used
show examples
 reasonably.
However
Linking Words
, A lot of people
use
Use synonyms
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
social
network
Fix the agreement mistake
networks
show examples
 wrongly which
is
Verb problem
apply
show examples
cause
Replace the word
causes
show examples
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
negitive
Correct your spelling
negative
 issues,
One
Use synonyms
 of the
example
Change to a plural noun
examples
show examples
 is
addicted
Replace the word
addiction
show examples
 and health problems.
Noadays
Correct your spelling
Nowadays
, There
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
 a lot of people who
use
Use synonyms
 the social network in
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 wrong way,
In addition
Linking Words
,
siting
Correct your spelling
sitting
show examples
 for
an
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Use synonyms
houres
Correct your spelling
hours
show examples
 on social
media
Use synonyms
App's
Change noun form
App
show examples
cuase
Correct your spelling
causes
 addiction
issue
Fix the agreement mistake
issues
show examples
.
Moreover
Linking Words
, sitting for
a long periods
Correct the article-noun agreement
long periods
a long period
show examples
 of
time
Use synonyms
 in front of screens will
reduces
Wrong verb form
reduce
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
vision.
Furtheremore
Correct your spelling
Furthermore
, you will not feel the
time
Use synonyms
 so that things will make you lazy and
be cause
Correct your spelling
because
show examples
 of obesity. There are many good solutions to the issue of social
media
Use synonyms
,
One
Use synonyms
 of the
way
Fix the agreement mistake
ways
show examples
 to solve
addictive
Replace the word
addiction
show examples
to
Add a missing verb
is to
show examples
put
Verb problem
apply
show examples
limit
time
Use synonyms
 for using social platforms like Instagram,
WhatssApp
Correct your spelling
WhatsApp
 and TikTok. To illustrate, putting the
Use synonyms
houres
Correct your spelling
hours
show examples
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
depend on the age range.
Beside
Replace the word
Besides
show examples
,
one
Use synonyms
 of the
survey
Fix the agreement mistake
surveys
show examples
shaerd
Correct your spelling
shared
 by
one
Use synonyms
 of the Dr in 2023 that show the between age five to ten years they need to
sitt
Correct your spelling
sit
 on
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
social
media
Use synonyms
 platforms for
one
Use synonyms
 hour only and
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
teenagers should spend two
Use synonyms
houres
Correct your spelling
hours
show examples
, and
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
adults for three to four
Use synonyms
houres
Correct your spelling
hours
show examples
 only.
Secondly
Linking Words
, doing stretches and
eersise
Correct your spelling
exercise
exercises
 when you
use
Use synonyms
 the screens and between
this
Linking Words
 will reduce the health problems.
To conclude
Linking Words
, The smart
one
Use synonyms
 who
know
Correct subject-verb agreement
knows
show examples
 how to take
advantages
Fix the agreement mistake
advantage
show examples
from
Change preposition
of
show examples
 social platforms. using
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
social
net work
Correct your spelling
network
show examples
 for
Correct article usage
a limit
show examples
limit
Replace the word
limited
show examples
time
Use synonyms
 will help to not be addicted.
Also
Linking Words
,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
exercise should be unforgettable to avoid
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
health problems because of sitting on
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
social
media
Use synonyms
 applications.

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coherence cohesion
Work on constructing sentences that are grammatically correct and clear. Pay attention to subject-verb agreement and proper tense usage.
coherence cohesion
Make sure your essay follows a smooth logical progression from one idea to the next. Use a clear outline with paragraphs that have a central idea.
task achievement
Expand on your ideas with more detailed explanations and examples to support your points. This will enhance the depth of your essay.
task achievement
Avoid repetitive language and try to use a variety of vocabulary to express your ideas more precisely.
coherence cohesion
The introduction clearly presents the problem of social media addiction and health issues caused by its misuse.
task achievement
The essay provides relevant solutions, such as setting time limits and doing exercises, which directly address the problem identified.
coherence cohesion
A clear conclusion is provided, summarizing the main points and solutions discussed in the essay.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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