Many countries have the same shops and products. Some consider it a positive development, whereas others consider it negative. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

The global presence of various stores and
products
having familiar features has raised many distinctive ideas in terms of its impacts, whether more benefits or drawbacks. From my perspective, I have an idea that
this
international development has advantages as **balanced** as disadvantages for both individuals and companies. On the bright side of
this
phenomenon, the benefits are for individuals, considering as customers or local
people
, are highly appreciated in many aspects.
People
could have easier access to high-quality goods and services provided by global brands, which may not be available in the local market.
This
availability ensures that consumers do not need to be concerned about their geographical position to approach those trustworthy experiences. Another facet of
this
development is to allow
people
to enhance their living standards through the plethora of job opportunities offered
as a result
of the emergence of international stores. In a better scenario, that could promote the local economy by boosting consumer spending and creating more job vacancies. On the downside, some ideas have indicated that the actuality of international shops or
products
poses some potential risks to local traditions and smaller industries. The concern about losing traditional diversity in host nations has become the worry of many
people
due to
the overwhelming of global brands over the local ones.
As a result
, the unique features and domestic cultures may gradually deteriorate.
For example
, some handicraft
products
are losing their value in the demand of users because of the powerful competitiveness of modern and high-end international
products
, which could result in some hardships for local entrepreneurs related to a reduction of profits and a lower brand image in the large market to keep surviving in the future. In conclusion,
while
the presence of global brands and goods offers beneficial impacts to local customers and citizens in terms of consuming
products
and enhancing the
overall
economy, it
also
lessens the image of local businesses and cultural diversity. I believe a balance should be maintained to limit the detrimental impacts and promote its benefits to generally preserve the culture and economic sustainability.
Submitted by thanhtu.thcsbt on

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task achievement
While the essay discusses both views and presents a clear opinion, adding more specific, concrete examples will strengthen the arguments further. This will help in achieving a higher band score for task achievement, specifically under 'relevant specific examples.'
coherence cohesion
Ensure smooth transitions between ideas and paragraphs. Some sections can be made more cohesive by using conjunctions and linking phrases more effectively. For instance, using phrases like 'additionally,' 'moreover,' and 'furthermore' can improve flow.
task achievement
The essay clearly discusses both views and presents a balanced opinion in the conclusion. The perspectives are well-considered and relevant to the topic.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, and the main points are supported by appropriate explanations. This shows a good structure.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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