Some people argue that competitive sports are good for bringing together different people and cultures.Other argue that these sports can cause problems and increase conflicts between nations. Discuss both the views and give your opinion?

#people #sports #cultures #conflicts #nations

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Competitive sports are an enjoyable form of entertainment which can evoke many emotions. Some

people

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believe in the unifying power of sport,

whereas

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others see it as a cause for commotion. I believe there is something to be said about both views, which I will discuss in

this

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essay. On the one hand, supporting different teams can highlight differences between the opposing sides. When there are national teams playing against each other, it causes

people

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to bring about historical context and nationalism, which adds to the emotion of the sport.

For example

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, the cricket match that makes the most amount of money has always been between India and Pakistan. The two countries have a complicated history intertwined with religion and fanaticism. Whenever these two teams play there is bound to be commotion after the fact. If these games were not played,

people

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would go about their regular days with a much lower chance of clashing.

On the other hand

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, when supporting the same team, it brings together

people

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of various backgrounds. It allows

people

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to unite with one focus in mind.

For instance

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, straight after the India vs. Pakistan cricket match, some supporters went to the local pub which held a viewing of the Euros football game in which England was playing. The individuals who were seething with animosity 15 minutes prior, were now seated together to cheer England on together. Without

this

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match, the emotions the supporters were feeling would have been totally different, and it would not have united these opposing fans. I believe that international competitive sports hold a very important place for fans, in which both the positive and the negative emotions are intertwined. Unfortunately,

this

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means, you cannot have one without the other and both polarising views are true.

Submitted by patelmeera on Sat Jul 13 2024

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coherence cohesion

Introduction could be slightly expanded to give a clearer roadmap of the essay structure.

task achievement

Though generally clear, further elaboration on some points would strengthen your arguments.

coherence cohesion

Improve the conclusion by summarizing the main points discussed in the body paragraphs.

task achievement

Good use of relevant examples to support the argument.

coherence cohesion

Clear logical flow between paragraphs and ideas.

coherence cohesion

Strong cohesive devices which made the essay easy to follow.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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5
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meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

294 words

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Some people argue that competitive sports are good for bringing together different people and cultures.Other argue that these sports can cause problems and increase conflicts between nations. Discuss both the views and give your opinion?

Fully explain your ideas

Children nowadays watch significantly more television than in the past, which reduces their activity levels accordingly. What are the advantages and disadvantages for children of watching television?

Some people say in order to prevent illnesses and diseases, governments should focus on reducing environmental pollution and housing problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In spite of the advances made in agriculture, many people around the world still go hungry. Why is this the case? What can be done about this problem?

Some people believe that children should start learning a foreign language at primary school rather than secondary school. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?