IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Some people think that companies and private individuals should bay to clean up the pollution that they produce, not the government. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #companies #individuals #bay #pollution #government
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It is argued that organizations and private
people
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 have to clean up their trash and the
pollution
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 they make, not the
government
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.
This
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 essay totally agrees with
this
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 statement because if everyone is responsible for their waste,
this
Linking Words
 will reduce the amount of
pollution
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.
Moreover
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,
this
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 makes
people
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 and
companies
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 involved in their society's development. The
government
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 should force
companies
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 and everyone in their country to clean their wastes and the
pollution
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 they release. which means everybody has a rule to keep the ecosystem healthy. being responsible for clean
pollution
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,
companies
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 and individuals polluting the environment will decrease.
For example
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, I used to cut down wood but when the
government
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 made a new rule that charged everyone who cut tree wood, I had to stop that. If individuals clean their
pollution
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, they will be involved in the development of their society.
This
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 is the key to making
people
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 contribute together to the improvement of the ecosystem,
such
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 as using public transportation
instead
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 of their cars,
this
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 will reduce air
pollution
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 from cars' carbon.
Furthermore
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, when
companies
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 have to clean their
pollution
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 like air
pollution
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, it means they have to put an employee for
this
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 job
,
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apply
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 and buy more for their
pollution
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.
As a result
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, they will reduce their trash and replace any machines with sustainable ones. In conclusion, the
government
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 should not be responsible for cleaning the
pollution
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 of organizations and private
people
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, they have to clean their waste.
This
Linking Words
 will make them reduce the amount of
pollution
Use synonyms
 and they will be part of the society's development.
Submitted by saja.alotaibi on

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relevant specific examples
Include more relevant and specific examples to strengthen your argument.
clear comprehensive ideas
Ensure that each paragraph contains one clear, comprehensive idea and avoid mixing multiple points.
complete response
The essay presents a clear position on the topic and generally stays on topic.
introduction conclusion present
The structure of the essay, including an introduction and conclusion, is generally well-organized.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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