IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

In the future, nobody will buy printed newspapers or books because they will be able to read everything they want online without paying. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

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People
Use synonyms
 believe that in the near future, none of them will ever
interested
Add a missing verb
be interested
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to buy
Change preposition
in buying
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 physical
books
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 or newspapers as they will prefer to obtain the
information
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 right through their smartphones. I firmly agree with
this
Linking Words
 statement since it can make
people
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 stay updated with the latest
information
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 easily.
Additionally
Linking Words
, it reduces the negative impacts
to
Change preposition
on
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 our planet as well. First and foremost,
such
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 a phenomenon will make
people
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 stay up-to-date with the current issues.
In other words
Linking Words
, individuals can access the news and
information
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 faster, rather than waiting for the newspaper boy to arrive at their home, or
to
Fix the infinitive
apply
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wait until they read the
information
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 once they
got
Wrong verb form
get
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 to a bookstore. During a traffic jam,
for instance
Linking Words
,
people
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at
Change preposition
on
show examples
a
Remove the article
apply
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public transportation can get
the
Correct article usage
apply
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information
Use synonyms
 related to a car accident on the first bend which happened a few minutes ago, simply by opening their mobile phones. Meanwhile, those who prefer to read the newspaper later at home have no idea what currently
happen
Change the form of the verb
happening
show examples
 around them.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, maximizing the use of online
books
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 and news applications can reduce
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
environmental damage. Printing
books
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 and newspapers may lead to an increase in air pollution rate and deforestation
rate
Fix the agreement mistake
rates
show examples
 as well. To illustrate, air pollution will increase
due to
Linking Words
 the distribution of
books
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 and newspapers, either to public bookstores or homes, by using a vehicle that generates greenhouse gas emissions. The production of papers,
moreover
Linking Words
, pursues companies to cut down the trees as wood is the main ingredient in order to make a piece of paper. In conclusion, I strongly believe that choosing to utilize online
books
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 and news apps is more beneficial and convenient for individuals.
Thus
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,
people
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 can always keep up with the current trends around them through their gadgets and in terms of
environmetal
Correct your spelling
environmental
 issues, it will lead to several positive impacts,
such
Linking Words
 as a decline in pollution and deforestation
rate
Fix the agreement mistake
rates
show examples
 simultaneously.

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Vocabulary
Try to use a wider range of vocabulary to make your essay more engaging and varied. This will enhance the overall richness of your text.
Grammar
Make sure to proofread your essay to correct any small grammatical errors or typos. For instance, 'currently happen' should be 'currently happening,' and 'environmetal' should be 'environmental.' These small errors can detract from the overall professionalism of your essay.
Cohesion
Improve your transitions between points. Using more transitional phrases or linking words can help to create a smoother flow between sentences and paragraphs.
Task Response
You have presented clear main points which address the task prompt effectively.
Introduction/Conclusion
Your introduction and conclusion are both present and effectively outline your viewpoint.
Examples
You used relevant examples to support your ideas, which helps to clarify your points.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • accessibility
  • convenience
  • cost-effective
  • cultural value
  • sentimental value
  • reliability
  • distracting
  • access to
  • digital devices
  • internet
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