IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 8

We cannot help everyone in the world that needs help, so we should only be concerned with our own communities and countries. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

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Currently, the interaction among
countries
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 cannot be avoided. Some
people
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 argue that we should only solve the domestic problem and ignore the demands of
people
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 from other
countries
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. I completely disagree with
this
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 opinion for several reasons. On the one hand,
people
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 should not only focus on their own
countries
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 because helping other
countries
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 can improve the domestic economy.
Firstly
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, domestic exports might increase
due to
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 support for foreigners. Some
countries
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 do not have relevant technologies to manufacture products, and
people
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 can sell domestic products to these
countries
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.
In addition
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, helping other
countries
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 can reduce the domestic unemployment rate. Many developing
countries
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 do not have comprehensive infrastructures,
such
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 as the express.
Therefore
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, developed
countries
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 can hire domestic workers to get involved in relevant projects.
For example
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, the Chinese government hires millions of workers to help African
countries
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 build local highways.
On the other hand
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, helping other
countries
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 can cultivate abilities to prevent disasters in the future. Volunteers can learn different skills when they help
people
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 from other
countries
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, preparing well for similar situations in their
countries
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.
For instance
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, the Chinese government perfectly tackles the issue of COVID-19 because it has a lot of experience in treating pandemics in other
countries
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. Meanwhile, helping other
countries
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 can establish a positive reputation. They will receive positive feedback when they help others in the world, which is helpful for the global development of the country. In conclusion,
people
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 should help other
countries
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 because it can improve the domestic economy. At the same time, helping
people
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 from other
countries
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 can cultivate skills to preserve potential disasters and establish a positive reputation in the global market.

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task achievement
Excellent job on task response. You've fully addressed the prompt and provided a well-rounded argument against the statement. Be cautious with over-generalizations and ensure every point directly supports your main idea.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a clear logical structure, with each paragraph well-organized and connected. However, try to ensure smoother transitions between paragraphs to make the text even more cohesive.
task achievement
Your response is clear and comprehensive, effectively covering all aspects of the question.
coherence cohesion
The logical structure of your essay is impressive, with each point being well-supported by relevant examples.
coherence cohesion
You have a strong introduction and conclusion, which effectively frame your argument.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • global interconnectivity
  • international cooperation
  • ethics
  • moral obligation
  • geographical borders
  • diplomatic relations
  • economic stability
  • global security
  • resource allocation
  • expertise
  • international aid
  • dependency and development
  • sustainable solutions
  • local and global initiatives
  • community resilience
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