Some people believe the government should invest more money to help tourism development. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion.
It is true that
tourism
plays an important role in countries or local communities. Some people think Use synonyms
governments
should spend more Use synonyms
money
on the development of Use synonyms
tourism
. I completely agree with Use synonyms
this
argument for several reasons.
On the one hand, Linking Words
governments
should provide Use synonyms
tourism
with more investment because it can improve the domestic economy. Use synonyms
Firstly
, the development of Linking Words
tourism
can help domestic industries make a big profit. With the popularity of local Use synonyms
tourism
, more visitors are attracted, and they will purchase many local products and souvenirs. At the same time, developing Use synonyms
tourism
can support other required areas. Use synonyms
Governments
can earn more tax income because of the success of Use synonyms
tourism
, and they will have sufficient Use synonyms
money
to help required areas, Use synonyms
such
as education and Linking Words
infrastructures
. Fix the agreement mistake
infrastructure
For example
, the Thai government invests a lot of Linking Words
money
to develop domestic Use synonyms
tourism
, and they spend Use synonyms
the
part of Correct article usage
apply
tourism
earnings on building highways and schools.
Use synonyms
On the other hand
, funding for Linking Words
tourism
development can promote domestic Use synonyms
culture
. A good travelling environment will attract more foreign tourists to learn Use synonyms
the
local Change preposition
about the
culture
and enhance Use synonyms
the
Correct article usage
apply
Use synonyms
culture
interaction. Replace the word
cultural
For example
, the Chinese government spend billions of dollars on Linking Words
tourism
during the Beijing Olympics, and Use synonyms
this
action successfully promotes Linking Words
the
Chinese Correct article usage
apply
culture
to the world. Use synonyms
Furthermore
, it is worth investing more Linking Words
money
in developing Use synonyms
tourism
because it can establish a positive reputation. Foreign visitors might have a positive impression of the country because of the good experience Use synonyms
in
Change preposition
of
traveling
.
In conclusion, it is valuable for Change the spelling
travelling
governments
to raise investments in developing Use synonyms
tourism
because it can improve the domestic economy. Meanwhile, developed Use synonyms
tourism
can promote local Use synonyms
culture
and establish a positive reputation effectively.Use synonyms
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task achievement
Your essay would benefit from slightly more detailed examples and elaboration, especially on how tourism directly impacts local industries and culture.
coherence cohesion
Consider using a wider range of vocabulary and more complex sentence structures to showcase your language proficiency better.
coherence cohesion
While the essay is well-structured, you could improve the transitions between paragraphs to ensure a smoother flow of ideas.
coherence cohesion
You have a clear and concise introduction and conclusion that effectively frame your argument.
task achievement
Your main points are well-supported with examples, making your argument compelling and easy to follow.
coherence cohesion
Your ideas are logically ordered, making it easy for the reader to follow your line of reasoning.
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
- firstly
- secondly
- thirdly
- in additional
- moreover
- also
- for example
- for instance
- therefore
- however
- although
- even though
- despite