Nowadays, distance-learning programs have gained in popularity, but some people argue that online courses can never be taken as good as those taken at a college or university in person. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

There is no denying the fact that space-learning programs have gained in popularity.
While
it is a commonly held belief that some crowds argue that online courses are causing massive issues for universities or colleges , there is
also
an argument that opposes it. I consider that online courses can assist teenagers to study in a high flexibility .
To begin
with ,
distance-learning
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distance learning
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is significant for all schools and universities
,
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apply
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because it leads to efficiency and flexibility in modern society.
In other words
, online learning
do
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does
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not
needs
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need
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more
efforts
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effort
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or
high
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a high
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amount of funds .
In addition
,
face to face
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face-to-face
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learning will pose significant challenges to our society .
For example
, it will lead to a lack focusing or
an
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apply
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issues in communication between teachers and students , because of
inferior
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an inferior
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environment. Another point to consider, learning online is
crucial
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a crucial
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solution for our environment and to keep it
healthear
Correct your spelling
healthy
and safer . It is
also
possible to say that learning online
prevent
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prevents
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the world from various
disease
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diseases
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such
as
corona virus
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coronavirus
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.
Moreover
, online sessions are beneficial for any developed and advanced
counties
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countries
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, which
it
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apply
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could able to assist their companies or applications
such
as
zoom
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Zoom
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or
discord
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Discord
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.
For instance
, Russia and America are two of the
most
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apply
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countries that utilize online sessions for their schools ,
because
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and because
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of that they are pivotal countries in our world. In conclusion, despite people having different views, I believe that the role of online and technology is massive things in our education life, so we should utilize technology wisely .
Submitted by pcah70 on

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task achievement
Ensure that your arguments are clearly articulated and fully developed. Your essay touches on some important points, but these need to be expanded with more detailed explanations and examples.
task achievement
Pay attention to the clarity of your ideas. Some sentences are unclear or awkwardly phrased, which affects the overall readability of your essay.
coherence cohesion
Work on improving the structure of your essay. While it has a clear introduction and conclusion, the body paragraphs could be better organized to enhance logical flow and coherence.
general
Avoid minor grammatical errors and typos. These can distract from your message and lower the perceived quality of your writing.
task achievement
Expand on your points with more specific examples and details to strengthen your arguments and make them more compelling.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which is important for a well-rounded response.
task achievement
You have touched on several important aspects of the issue, such as flexibility in online learning and its environmental benefits.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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