Nowadays, distance-learning programs have gained in popularity, but some people argue that online courses can never be taken as good as those taken at a college or university in person. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
There is no denying the fact that space-learning programs have gained in popularity.
While
Linking Words
it is a commonly held belief that some crowds argue that online courses are causing massive issues for universities or colleges , there is
also
Linking Words
an argument that opposes it. I consider that online courses can assist teenagers to study in a high flexibility .
To begin
Linking Words
with ,
distance-learning
Correct your spelling
distance learning
show examples
is significant for all schools and universities
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
because it leads to efficiency and flexibility in modern society.
In other words
Linking Words
, online learning
do
Change the verb form
does
show examples
not
needs
Change the verb form
need
show examples
more
efforts
Fix the agreement mistake
effort
show examples
or
high
Correct article usage
a high
show examples
amount of funds .
In addition
Linking Words
,
face to face
Add a hyphen
face-to-face
show examples
learning will pose significant challenges to our society .
For example
Linking Words
, it will lead to a lack focusing or
an
Correct the article-noun agreement
apply
show examples
issues in communication between teachers and students , because of
inferior
Correct article usage
an inferior
show examples
environment. Another point to consider, learning online is
crucial
Add an article
a crucial
show examples
solution for our environment and to keep it
healthear
Correct your spelling
healthy
and safer . It is
also
Linking Words
possible to say that learning online
prevent
Correct subject-verb agreement
prevents
show examples
the world from various
disease
Fix the agreement mistake
diseases
show examples
such
Linking Words
as
corona virus
Correct your spelling
coronavirus
show examples
.
Moreover
Linking Words
, online sessions are beneficial for any developed and advanced
counties
Correct your spelling
countries
show examples
, which
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
could able to assist their companies or applications
such
Linking Words
as
zoom
Capitalize word
Zoom
show examples
or
discord
Capitalize word
Discord
show examples
.
For instance
Linking Words
, Russia and America are two of the
most
Fix the agreement mistake
apply
show examples
countries that utilize online sessions for their schools ,
because
Correct word choice
and because
show examples
of that they are pivotal countries in our world. In conclusion, despite people having different views, I believe that the role of online and technology is massive things in our education life, so we should utilize technology wisely .
Submitted by pcah70 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
Ensure that your arguments are clearly articulated and fully developed. Your essay touches on some important points, but these need to be expanded with more detailed explanations and examples.
task achievement
Pay attention to the clarity of your ideas. Some sentences are unclear or awkwardly phrased, which affects the overall readability of your essay.
coherence cohesion
Work on improving the structure of your essay. While it has a clear introduction and conclusion, the body paragraphs could be better organized to enhance logical flow and coherence.
general
Avoid minor grammatical errors and typos. These can distract from your message and lower the perceived quality of your writing.
task achievement
Expand on your points with more specific examples and details to strengthen your arguments and make them more compelling.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which is important for a well-rounded response.
task achievement
You have touched on several important aspects of the issue, such as flexibility in online learning and its environmental benefits.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: