Some people say that children should be involved in making schools' rules. Some argue that adults should be in charge of making rules. Discuss both view and give your opinion.
Arguing to create a school’s policy is important today. The public says that
students
should be included in making rules
at school. Others believe that producing the policy is the responsibility of teachers or parents. I think that youngsters must be involved in establishing some policies at school in order to improve their abilities.
Building school rules
is interesting for some students
because it can boost their skills and give them more advantages. For instance
, this
condition lets students
learn to decide something new in their life. Additionally
, parents will be happy because the presence of their kids really matters for the school’s living. Moreover
, teachers will know what students
need and their points of view. In contrast
, their decisions are not valid because youngsters do not have good mature ideas.
On the other hand
, sometimes, children’s critical thinking has not given them valid or legitimate actions yet, and they still need guidance from adults. Furthermore
, adults have a better outlook to pinpoint something because of their experience. Consequently
, they can choose the best choices among some criteria. However
, sometimes, children do not like their views because the rules
are strict enough for them because they always explore whatever they like so they tend to break the rules
. In the end, children disobey the policy and become more rebellious.
In conclusion, I believe that children must be involved in creating rules
at schools. It can sharpen their critical thinking and skills in the future. However
, guidance from adults should be included in order to make the best choices.Submitted by irhamtaufiqurrahman on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
task achievement
Your ideas are well-articulated and the essay has a good logical structure. However, providing more specific examples can help strengthen your arguments and make your points more persuasive.
coherence cohesion
You have a clear introduction and conclusion. Nevertheless, enhancing the linking phrases between paragraphs can improve overall flow and coherence.
task achievement
You have effectively introduced the topic and presented balanced arguments from both perspectives before giving a reasoned opinion.
coherence cohesion
Your essay demonstrates a logical structure with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion that contributes to the overall clarity.