At the present time, populations of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people. Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?
Nowadays, the population growth rate skyrocketed in
a disparate
Correct the article-noun agreement
disparate countries
a disparate country
countries
. However
, the percentage between the elderly and youths is unnoticeable. A wide range of countries
have a significant number of young people
. In this
essay, I will elaborate on the pros and cons.
On the one hand, youths are the backbone of the nation. They have a lot of merits and energy, which can help the country. Moreover
, they are vibrant, thus
they have the ability to accomplish a lot of tasks. They also
have the ability to learn swiftly and in effortless ways. For instance
, China is the largest population country in numbers and the individuals from age 20 to 35 are more than half of all the people
. Therefore
, most of the industries are there. They are aware and productive people
. In addition
, they can cope with any method related to technology. They know more about hardware, software and platforms, hence
they can provide more industries and activities related to the technology. Another example, German society is struggling now because of the low number of young people
. They opened the migration to increase the number of people
. This
had an inferior effect on the German economy.
On the other hand
, a diverse range of the new generation is reckless. They can not hold on to their spirits so a wide spectrum of their resolutions is wrong. For example
, when the Japanese Emperor attempted to attack the Iraqi ports. This
led to the second world war
. The old Correct your spelling
Second World War
people
are wiser than the young. Most of the big positions are led by old people
. Recently, a wide range of affluent youth have been sluggish. They do not want to assist the community and be productive persons in it. For instance
, in Middle Eastern countries
, most harsh jobs are done by foreign people
. These countries
are relying more on them.
In conclusion, young people
play a crucial role in our lives. They should be led by diligent persons. If we know how to utilize them in a beneficial way, they will enhance the community and will be helpfulSubmitted by mohannadsme on
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task achievement
Try to refine the introduction to more clearly state the main argument. This will set a stronger framework for your essay and make the topic clearer to the reader.
task achievement
Ensure that your examples are directly relevant to the point being made, and avoid digressions that do not add value to the argument.
coherence cohesion
Work on developing paragraphs with a clear topic sentence and logical progression of ideas within each paragraph. This will improve the overall coherence of your essay.
task achievement
Addressing the counterarguments more deeply would provide a more balanced perspective and demonstrate a thorough understanding of the topic.
coherence cohesion
The essay is organized with clear paragraphs, which helps with the overall flow and readability.
task achievement
Your essay includes specific examples and attempts to balance the argument by discussing both advantages and disadvantages.
coherence cohesion
The conclusion effectively summarizes the main points and restates the importance of the topic.