Some species of animals are almost extinct; and many others seem to be fast approaching a similar risk. What are the reasons for this? What should be done to solve this problem? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge and experience. Write at least 250 words.

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Nowadays, some animal species
have
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are
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almost extinct. And many others are prone to
extinction
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as well.
This
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essay will discuss the potential reasons
Such
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as hunting. and suggest a few solutions to solve
this
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issue. First and foremost, animal
extinction
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is one of the biggest challenges we face today. And the primary reason why animals disappear is hunting. It is believed that hunting can harm animal's life chains.
Moreover
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, accelerates the
extinction
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process. Some
people
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do these activities just for fun. Especially the rich
people
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.
For example
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, a survey in Japan showed that 82% of wealthy families have killed more than 60.000 animals every year just for entertainment.
This
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highlights why a huge portion of animals have disappeared. To address
this
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issue. One effective solution could be that the government should put strict rules.
additionally
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, make hunting illegal for the general public. Another possible suggestion to tackle
this
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problem is that the government should
also
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launch a publicity campaign in the media and schools to educate
people
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about the dangers of animal
extinction
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. an awareness campaign could shed some light on
this
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difficult situation and allow
people
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to be more open and honest about it.
For example
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, a similar initiative in India resulted in a 49% decrease in
this
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crisis after they launched a couple of campaigns. In conclusion, animal
extinction
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is a very dangerous problem. And it will affect us in both the short and long term.
Hence
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, we need to tackle
this
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by preventing hunting and aware
people
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of the possible damage.
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coherence cohesion
Work on sentence structure to avoid fragmented ideas. For example, 'animal extinction is one of the biggest challenges we face today. And the primary reason...' could be written as 'Animal extinction is one of the biggest challenges we face today, with hunting being a primary reason.'
task achievement
Try to enhance your vocabulary and use more varied language. For instance, instead of 'put strict rules,' you could say 'implement stringent regulations.'
task achievement
Ensure all points are fully developed and supported with evidence. For example, you could elaborate more on the reasons behind why hunting is prevalent among wealthy people.
task achievement
The essay effectively identifies hunting as a primary cause of animal extinction, providing relevant statistics.
coherence cohesion
Both introduction and conclusion are present, and they clearly define the problem and propose a solution.
task achievement
Real-life examples, such as those from Japan and India, were used to support your main points, adding credibility to the essay.

Your opinion

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Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

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...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • species extinction
  • endangered animals
  • biodiversity
  • habitat loss
  • deforestation
  • urbanization
  • poaching
  • illegal wildlife trade
  • climate change
  • pollution
  • conservation efforts
  • legislation
  • enforcement
  • human overpopulation
  • sustainable development
  • responsible consumption
  • education
  • awareness programs
  • protected areas
  • wildlife reserves
  • international cooperation
  • collaboration
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