Some people think that the most important thing about being rich is it gives a person the opportunity to help other people. Do you agree or disagree?

By surveying human history, it is very obvious that there are numerous businessmen throughout history, who have been unforgettable for the support and help they gave to their communities. There are many individuals, including me, who believe in the idea that rich people are supposed to stand up for their societies and look for their needs.
Therefore
,
this
essay will shed more light on the pros that a person can receive from being a rich man.
Firstly
, through hiring others, the businessman could expand his company.
In other words
, standing out for the unemployed residents and offering good opportunities to them not only benefits them but
also
gives the employees the chance to various their work. A good example of
this
is what happened in China. When vehicle companies started providing jobs for their citizens, later on, one of the remarkable consequences was increasing the economy of the country.
Secondly
,
this
kind of act leads to building strong relations between society members. To explain more, when a rich person donates to incapable people, undeniably he gains their respect and trust.
According to
a statistic that has been published in the New York Times, there is a loyalty from people in general to those who help them and they are ready to give back more than what they received at the right time.
To conclude
, being a rich man does not mean working alone,
on the contrary
, its true meaning is giving and gaining others' respect through providing many job vacancies and donating to their needs.
Submitted by tahanialessa2021 on

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coherence cohesion
Work on refining the logical flow between paragraphs to make arguments more interconnected and easier to follow.
task achievement
Ensure that each main point is thoroughly supported with more detailed examples and counter-arguments where appropriate.
language and grammar
Pay close attention to sentence structures and grammatical accuracy to enhance readability and clarity.
coherence cohesion
The essay contains a clear introduction and conclusion, which frame the argument well.
task achievement
The essay provides relevant specific examples, such as the reference to China and vehicle companies, to support the main points.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • wealthy
  • financial resources
  • philanthropy
  • charitable organizations
  • donations
  • fundraising
  • support
  • initiatives
  • contribute
  • fulfillment
  • purpose
  • selfless
  • altruistic
  • prioritize
  • personal gain
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