The best way to teach children to cooperate is through team sports at school. To what extent do you agree or disagree? You should write at least 250 words
In modern society, there is an ongoing debate about whether children can learn
cooperation
through team
sports
or not, with some people believing that the best way to study cooperation
is team
Change preposition
through team
sports
. In this
essay, I will argue and explain what team
activities contribute to children.
To begin
with, I firmly believe that playing football teaches to
Change preposition
apply
Add an article
the player
player
to trust Fix the agreement mistake
players
between
each other. Change preposition
apply
Additionally
, by playing football, young people realise cooperation
is the most important. As a result
, children who take part in this
sport are encouraged to coopearate
Correct your spelling
cooperate
each
other Change preposition
with each
while
game. For example
, according to
the National Statistics Office, numerous teenagers have acquired their ways to cooperate since they played football.
On top of that, countless experts claim that a lot of winer
teams show better Correct your spelling
winter
cooperation
and trust than other
Change the wording
another team
other teams
team
. Furthermore
, when young people play team
activities, they should communicate how they play and ask other play
to help. For these reasons, they learn about how to help Replace the word
players
other
and Fix the agreement mistake
others
importance
of Correct article usage
the importance
cooperation
. For instance
, a recent survey has shown that many students'moral
and Correct your spelling
students moral
cooperatal
Correct your spelling
cooperative
cooperated
cooperate
act
Fix the agreement mistake
acts
rose
by 30% point since schools introduced Wrong verb form
have risen
teams
Change noun form
teams'
team's
sports
Correct word choice
and sports
program
.
In my opinion, it is apparent that Fix the agreement mistake
programs
teams
Change the noun form
team
sports
is the best way to acquire cooperation
. This
is because,
they have to communicate and help each other Remove the comma
apply
while
match.
In conclusion, while
it is undeniable that there are some advantages and disadvantages, it is clear that
playing team
activities Change preposition
in team
exert
a positive Correct subject-verb agreement
exerts
influnce
on their growth.Correct your spelling
influence
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task achievement
Your essay does a good job of addressing the task prompt, but there are places where you can be more specific or detailed in your arguments. Additionally, try to present your ideas in a clearer, more organized manner to ensure that your main points stand out.
coherence cohesion
Work on maintaining a logical flow throughout the essay. Although you have a clear introduction and conclusion, some transitions between your main points and examples can be smoother. Consider using linking phrases to improve coherence and cohesion.
task achievement
The essay contains relevant examples that help to support your argument, such as the statistics and survey results you mentioned.
coherence cohesion
You have included an introduction and conclusion, which helps to frame your argument and provide closure for the reader.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.