IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

the economic development is the only way to end proverty while others believe that it is causing dmage to the environment and so should be stopped discuss both views and give your opinion, with proper exaple

Economic
development
Use synonyms
 is often seen as the most effective way to eradicate
poverty
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, as it creates jobs, increases incomes, and improves living standards.
However
Linking Words
, some people argue that
this
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 growth causes significant environmental damage and should be halted to protect the planet.
This
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 essay will discuss both views and explain why I believe sustainable economic
development
Use synonyms
 is the best solution. Economic
development
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 plays a vital role in reducing
poverty
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 worldwide. When countries grow economically, they generate employment and increase government revenue, which can be used for social welfare.
For example
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, China’s rapid economic growth has lifted over 800 million people out of
poverty
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 since 1980, reducing its
poverty
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 rate from 88% to less than 1%.
This
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 demonstrates how
development
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 improves lives by providing opportunities and access to essential services
such
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 as education and healthcare.
On the other hand
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, economic
development
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 often harms the environment. Industrial activities lead to pollution, deforestation, and greenhouse gas emissions.
For instance
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, global carbon dioxide emissions reached about 36 billion tonnes in 2022, much of it from developing countries expanding their industries. India faces severe air pollution, causing nearly 1.67 million premature deaths annually.
Such
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 environmental problems can undermine public health and natural resources, which ultimately affect
poverty
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 levels. In conclusion, economic
development
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 is crucial to ending
poverty
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but
Punctuation problem
, but
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must
Correct pronoun usage
it must
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 be balanced with environmental protection. Halting
development
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 would worsen
poverty
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,
while
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 unchecked growth damages the planet.
Therefore
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, adopting sustainable
development
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 practices,
such
Linking Words
 as investing in renewable energy and green technology, is the best way to ensure economic progress benefits both people and the environment

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task response
Add more depth to each point. Explain why the view can be hard to use in real life and give a stronger link to your main idea.
coherence
Make each paragraph start with a clear topic sentence and use simple link words to show how ideas are linked.
accuracy
Check facts and keep data simple. If you include numbers, be sure they are correct and easy to read.
content
Clear view on both sides with a firm personal idea.
evidence
Good use of examples to show points.
organization
Strong structure, with an intro, two body parts, and a conclusion.
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