Countries are becoming more and more similar because people are able to buy the same products anywhere in the world. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

Nowadays,
globalization
Correct article usage
the globalization
show examples
process is developing and extending all over the
world
.
Countries
are becoming more similar to each other
due to
the fact that anywhere in the
world
the same products are accessible. In my
opinion
Add a comma
opinion,
show examples
it is a positive development.
Because thanks
Correct word choice
Thanks
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to
this
,
exchange
Correct article usage
the exchange
show examples
of goods and communication between nations exists and evolves.
Firstly
, more and more products are becoming accessible in any part of the
world
.
Countries
are exchanging with
diversity
Add an article
a diversity
the diversity
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of useful
newcoming
Correct your spelling
new-coming
, creative ideas and important developments for life.
Due to
this
, a lot of
countries
that may suffer from any scarcities or
epidemies
Correct your spelling
epidemics
epidemic
, find remedies in
another
Replace the adjective
another country
other countries
show examples
countries
.
For example
, Kazakhstan needs more water resources, because the current ones are not sufficient today. If we didn’t have international trade with access to water, Kazakhstan would suffer from drought.
Secondly
, during the trade, people enhance international
relationship
Fix the agreement mistake
relationships
show examples
. They interact with foreigners and,
thus
, people receive an opportunity to scrutinize other perspectives, approaches and in general the way people live.
This
facilitates peace
in
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on
show examples
the
world
stage and broadens our horizons so
as
Correct word choice
that
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we
could
Wrong verb form
can
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consider
other angle
Change the wording
another angle
other angles
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of view. In many cases it could be beneficial,
for instance
, the treatment for the
Corona Virus
Correct your spelling
coronavirus
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was developed in
a
Correct article usage
the
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cooperation of
USA
Correct article usage
the USA
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and Germany.
To sum up
, the availability of resources in all
countries
is a good development, because now we can cooperate and find a solution to any threat. In my opinion,
this
is an investment
to
Change preposition
in
show examples
our commonwealth and prosperity. If earlier, we would have to travel to another country in order to survive and get amenities, now in most developed and developing
countries
all conditions have been created and most resources are available.
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task response
To strengthen your task response, ensure that your main points are consistently supported with clear examples. For instance, you mentioned that international trade helped Kazakhstan combat drought, but providing a bit more detail about how such trade works would be beneficial.
coherence cohesion
To improve coherence, try linking your paragraphs more explicitly. For instance, signing off a paragraph with a transitional phrase that introduces the next idea can help. This will make your essay flow more smoothly for the reader.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a clear and logical structure, beginning with an introduction that leads into well-organized body paragraphs and concludes with a strong summary.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are both clearly presented, offering a well-rounded response to the question posed.
task response
The main ideas in your essay are generally clear and well-developed, making your position on the topic easy to understand.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • globalization
  • diversity
  • homogenization
  • cultural assimilation
  • global connection
  • local businesses
  • economic impact
  • consumerism
  • standardization
  • westernization
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