In spite of the advances made in agriculture, many people around the world still go hungry. Why is this the case? what can be done about this problem?

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In the contemporary world, with the rapid growth of technology, the industries related to agriculture experienced a significant improvement. Despite these advances made in agriculture, many

individuals

Use synonyms

around the world are still hungry. There are several factors why

people

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still suffer from famine and malnutrition.

However

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, steps can definitely be taken to tackle

this

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issue. Numerous factors contribute to why

people

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still do not get enough

food

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Firstly

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, the amount of

food

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is not distributed fairly among

people

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For instance

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, citizens in developed

countries

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tend to overeat,

thus

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according to

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statistics, almost 40% of USA citizens are obese,

while

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in many parts of Africa, close to 70% of

individuals

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suffer from diseases related to malnutrition.

Secondly

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, some

countries

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have advanced facilities and they use modern equipment for cultivation,

however

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, many

countries

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do not have access to these up-to-date technologies, so, they cannot feed all the

people

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Lastly

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although

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in most

countries

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there is enough land to plant and grow many crops, the impact of overpopulation is significant, making it difficult to grow

food

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for everyone. Despite all these troubles, measures can be taken to alleviate

this

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situation. One practical action is to set a penalty for obese

individuals

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who overeat (not for their condition).

For instance

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, in Japan, insurance companies do not cover obese

individuals

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, or take more money from them. At the same time, national institutions

such

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as UNESCO and UNICEF should take steps to mitigate the problem.

Similarly

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, governments should give priority to low-income families. Many families suffer from lacking money and they cannot make ends meet. In conclusion, there are many reasons why with the advancement of the agricultural system,

people

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still suffer from a lack of

food

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. The problem will remain stable if governments and global institutions do not take any measures to address

this

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issue.

amir1375.6Wed Jul 24 2024

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task achievement

Your essay addresses the prompt well by identifying relevant reasons and solutions for hunger despite advances in agriculture. However, adding more depth and development to each reason and solution could strengthen your argument.

coherence cohesion

Enhance the logical flow in your essay. While your points are clear, ensure there is a smooth transition between ideas. Adding linking words or phrases can help with this.

coherence cohesion

Although your main points are well-supported, try to include more detailed explanations or additional examples to reinforce your arguments further.

coherence cohesion

Your introduction clearly sets the stage for the essay and your conclusion effectively summarizes the key points discussed.

task achievement

You include relevant and specific examples that strengthen your argument, such as the statistics on obesity in the USA versus malnutrition in Africa.

Answer the 'Problem and Solution' topic

Problem-and-solution essays fall naturally into two parts, the first describing and exploring the problem, the second setting out the solution or solutions.

You essay structure should look something like this:

Introduction
Body paragraph 1 – Problems
Body paragraph 2 – Solutions
Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

One of the first problems of the...
Another problem that needs to be considered...
A possible solution to this problem would be...
One immediate practical solution is to...

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12
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

300 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

inequality
distribution
access to resources
climate change
natural disasters
political factors
economic factors
agricultural practices
infrastructure
transportation
population growth
education
knowledge
food waste

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In spite of the advances made in agriculture, many people around the world still go hungry. Why is this the case? what can be done about this problem?

Answer the 'Problem and Solution' topic

It is common that in many companies people from different ages work together in a same team. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantges?

Too much emphasis is given for education of the young. More government money should be spent to free time activities of young people. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Getting promotion is one of the biggest drives for people to apply themselves and work hard in modern workplace. Why do you think people are so driven to get promotion? What other factors influence people to work hard?