IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

The most important element in a person’s life is their work. Without a satisfying career, life is meaningless. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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Having a stable
job
Use synonyms
 is the most important thing in every person’s life. A happy life requires a successful career. I totally agree with
this
Linking Words
 statement, because occupation gives chances for people to pay for the necessary services and is
also
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 crucial for
productivity
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.
Firstly
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, career growth brings people a stable income.
This
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 allows them to maintain financial stability to meet their daily needs. Nowadays education, healthcare and other basic services cost money and it is challenging to live without these requirements.
For example
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, Steve Harvey's book "Act
like
Capitalize word
Like
show examples
 a Lady, Think
like
Capitalize word
Like
show examples
 a Man" says that without a stable
job
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 and income, a person cannot realize himself in other spheres of life. If a person wants to be successful,
then
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 he must find a
job
Use synonyms
that is
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 designed for him.
Secondly
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, an occupation is responsible for people's
productivity
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. The
job
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 provides an organizational environment with a regular work schedule and tasks.
This
Linking Words
 helps to create a sense of routine and accountability, which
make
Correct subject-verb agreement
makes
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 it easier for workers to stay motivated and on track. Not feeling satisfied with a goal can result in increased levels of stress and depression. Japan is a vivid example
for
Change preposition
of
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this
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 situation. Japanese workers are known for their discipline and dedication. Employees are recognized for their achievements and contributions, which motivates them to increase
productivity
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.
To sum up
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,
profession
Correct article usage
the profession
show examples
 gives a lot of opportunities for employees. It provides both the satisfaction of basic needs and the
productivity
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 of daily work.
For
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this
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 reason, every individual should choose
Use synonyms
job
Add an article
a job
the job
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 and achieve goals in 
this
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 area.

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introduction conclusion present
You have a clear introduction and conclusion, but ensure that your thesis statement clearly outlines the scope of the essay. Try to make your conclusion a bit stronger by summarizing the main points more clearly.
supported main points
Your ideas are mostly well-supported, but it would be helpful to include more diverse examples and elaboration on some points to enhance clarity and comprehensiveness.
logical structure
While your essay is well-structured, consider using more transitional phrases to enhance the flow and make the connections between paragraphs more explicit.
complete response
You successfully addressed the task and provided relevant examples to support your main points.
clear comprehensive ideas
Your essay flows logically, and your points are generally clear and well-supported.
introduction conclusion present
The conclusion effectively sums up the main arguments and reinforces your stance on the topic.
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