In some parts of the world traditional festivals and celebrations have disappeared or are disappearing. What do you think are the causes of this development and what measures could be taken to solve it?

#parts #world #festivals #celebrations #development #measures

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Many people worldwide think that traditional

celebrations

Use synonyms

no longer have the same crucial impact on their lives

due to

Linking Words

urbanization, leading people to leave their cultural heritage behind.

This

Linking Words

essay will discuss both reasons for the rapid advancement of

this

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phenomenon, and what procedures can be made to help avoid

this

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problem. One of the most common factors in the disappearance of traditional festivals is the lack of promoting and supporting the organizations responsible for these

events

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because governments do not consider investing in cultural practices a top priority,

instead

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they prefer spending the

country

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's revenue on other vital sectors in their opinion

such

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as education, infrastructure, and healthcare, especially impoverished countries since they can not waste any money on fostering these

celebrations

Use synonyms

For example

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, countries like Nigeria and Kenya have magnificent traditional customs, but the tough situations these nations are going through, prevent them from spending money on cultural practices. The other main reason is the less interest new generations have in showing off their special

celebrations

Use synonyms

to the world, and the desire to learn more about it, resulting in losing the value of celebrating

such

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occasions. Technological evaluation somehow caused

this

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issue because it occupied children, and decreased their passion for authentic cultural

events

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. Nowadays, lads all around the world spend most of their time on technological devices, to the point they start to forget about social interactions, which are the first motivation for traditional festivals. In terms of measures that can be taken to solve

this

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problem, educational programs must be given to school students about the importance of conserving traditional

events

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. In order to, plant devotion on them toward their traditions because they will be contributors to transporting these customs to the next generation.

For instance

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, in Egyptian schools, students are

being

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

taught everything about the

country

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's customs, and each region's

celebrations

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. So,

this

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action leads to the spread of knowledge,

effecting

Correct your spelling

affecting

show examples

Change preposition

apply

show examples

how Egyptian citizens respect their cultural heritage.

Moreover

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, authorities should be boosted to spend more of the

country

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's income on promoting responsible institutions to revitalize traditional festivals

as well as

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bringing back their significance. Like what Qatari governments do to support Grangao, an important event in the Qatari culture

that is

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held in the middle of Ramadan, the Muslims' obligation. On that day the whole

country

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has an official vacation to be able to enjoy the celebration alongside dedicating a small caravan for every region to distribute sweets to the children, incorporating the joyful feelings of celebration to

this

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day makes citizens from kids to adults try their best to value

this

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precious day for rest of their lives. In conclusion, the disappearance of traditional

events

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is a normal phenomenon

due to

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lots of factors, and it is predicted to continue developing unless we take immediate actions to stop it or at least reduce it by motivating governments with individuals to preserve reviving them.

Furthermore

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, promoting campaigns is going to be significantly beneficial in teaching people more about their cultural practices.

Submitted by salmanasrnasr on Thu Jul 25 2024

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coherence cohesion

Consider breaking down long sentences into shorter ones for ease of understanding. Also, ensure that paragraph transitions are smoother.

task achievement

Some minor grammatical errors are present. Proofread your work to catch these small mistakes, which could help in achieving a higher score.

task achievement

Provided relevant and specific examples, which strongly support the main points of your essay.

coherence cohesion

The essay structure is logical and easy to follow, with a clear introduction and conclusion.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

6.5

Logical structure

7.5

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.5

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

498 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Urbanization
Modernization
Homogenization
Globalization
Cultural practices
Economic pressures
Cultural heritage
Digital entertainment
Cultural organizations
Educational programs
Cultural tourism
Revitalize
Authentic cultural events
Traditional customs
Incorporating modern elements

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In some parts of the world traditional festivals and celebrations have disappeared or are disappearing. What do you think are the causes of this development and what measures could be taken to solve it?

Your opinion

Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? People learn things better from those at their own level—such as fellow students or co-workers—than from those at a higher level, such as teachers or supervisors. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

In a number of countries, some people think it is necessary to spend large sums of money on constructing new railway lines for very fast trains between cities. Others believe the money should be spent on improving existing public transport. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Some people believe that time spent on television, video and computer games can be valuable for children. Others beleve this may have negative effects on a child's development. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Many people used distance- learning programs to study at home, but some people think that it cannot bring the benefits as much as attending college or university. To what extent do you agree or disagree?