IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6

Some believe that a tax on companies should be introduced to reduce industrial pollution. Others believe that other measures should be taken to solve the problem. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#believe #tax #companies #pollution #measures
With the exponential progress of industrialisation, the environment has faced particular threats from factorial excess
waste
. A sizable number of people argue that the government should impose taxes on
companies
 in order to minimize pollution,
while
 others oppose
this
 idea and call for alternatives to be taken.
This
 essay will discuss the two sides and explain why I agree more with the latter view. On the one hand, environmental taxes work effectively as a measure to trace down
corporations
’
actions
. It is understandable why folks demand heavy taxation on
companies
 since
this
 will restrain
factory’s
Correct article usage
the factory’s
show examples
 activities and oblige leaders to look for new ways to handle excess
waste
.
However
,
corporations
 may suffer from financial constraints if the policy is implemented.
For instance
, a company must pay for hired
labor
Change the spelling
labour
show examples
, facilities, and ingredients;
therefore
, they might collapse under tariffs for unintended
waste
.
Additionally
,
corporations
 can control their
waste
 to just under the requirement to avoid paying taxes without taking actual
actions
. By that means, taxation might be the suitable solution to punish a company, not to reduce pollution.
On the other hand
, others believe that different measures should be considered to solve
this
 urgent issue. To make sure
corporations
 are taking practical
actions
, the government can send people to inspect
then
Correct word choice
and then
show examples
 report the data.
By
Change preposition
In
show examples
this
 way,
companies
 will comply with the rules, take responsibility and stay disciplined since they do not acknowledge when they are supervised. Another solution
highlights
Correct pronoun usage
that highlights
show examples
 the effort to protect the environment is enforcing factories to spare an amount of profits on habitat conservation.
This
 can be seen in the UK where industries must spend 10% of their gains on biodiversity, which caters to the demand of reducing environmental contamination
as well as
 ensuring a functioning economy with
corporations
 as the backbone. In the denouement,
while
 the importance of taxation is undeniable, it is better for punishments to be tailored based on one’s financial situation and environmental implications. In order to sustain a stable economy
as well as
 reduce pollution, I strongly think that governments should impose alternative solutions
such
 as inspection and expenses on habitat conservation so
companies
 are aware of their activities and take practical
actions
.
Submitted by hawtzvnq on

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task achievement
Try to include more specific examples to support your points. For instance, mentioning a real company or case where taxation or other measures have worked could strengthen your argument.
coherence cohesion
Consider refining the transition between paragraphs to make the flow even smoother. Sometimes, using transitional phrases like 'Moreover,' or 'Furthermore,' can help link ideas more seamlessly.
task achievement
You have provided a balanced discussion by addressing both views effectively and presenting your own opinion clearly.
coherence cohesion
Your essay is well-structured with a clear introduction, body paragraphs that support your main points, and a strong conclusion.
coherence cohesion
The ideas are well-organized and logically presented, contributing to a smooth reading experience.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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