Some people believe that it is wrong to keep animals in zoos, while others think that zoos are both entertaining and ecologically important. Discuss both views and give your opinon.

#people #animals #zoos #opinon

Some

people

would argue that it is a bad thing to keep

animals

zoos

while

others would say that keeping

animals

zoos

is good for entertainment and educational purposes. I believe that

animals

should stay in a wildlife reserve because they can live their lives in the right way. On the one hand, many

people

think that keeping habitats in

zoos

will help to educate students and children about it. Because young

people

will visit

zoos

and they will find many information about each animal.

Thus

make

Correct subject-verb agreement

makes

show examples

people

learn more about

animals

with entertainment.

For example

, many

people

go to

zoos

to take photos with

animals

such

as hours and sometimes they ride it.

However

, I believe that we can use different methods to educate children and students about

animals

On the other hand

, individuals think it is a bad idea to keep

animals

zoos

This

is against animal rights because they can not live like other

animals

In other words

animals

zoos

stay in close places and

zoos

' staffs bring their food,

this

is opposite to how

animals

used to find their food.

For example

, a recent survey found that the number of

animals

kept in

zoos

increased in the

last

few years and

this

made animal numbers decrease. In my opinion, I believe that

animals

should live normally with their freedom in wildlife rather than keep them in

zoos

. In conclusion,

although

keeping

animals

zoos

has an advantage like using them for educational purposes, it is against animal rights because they lose their freedom and only stay in

a close places

Correct the article-noun agreement

close places

a close place

show examples

to let

people

watch them. It is recommended that the government should make rules to limit

people

who use

animals

for

entertaining

Replace the word

entertainment

show examples

Submitted by sarraadel1551 on Fri Jul 26 2024

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task achievement

Develop the argument for both sides with more depth and detail. Provide additional points that can support your opinion in the conclusion.

coherence cohesion

Improve the logical flow between paragraphs and sentences. Use more cohesive devices and transitional phrases to make your argument easier to follow.

coherence cohesion

Ensure that all examples are directly relevant to the points being discussed, and try to avoid repeating similar ideas.

coherence cohesion

The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion that encapsulate the main points of your argument.

task achievement

You have made a good attempt to present both sides of the argument, which is critical in a discussion essay.

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10Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

290 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people believe that it is wrong to keep animals in zoos, while others think that zoos are both entertaining and ecologically important. Discuss both views and give your opinon.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

overpopulation in many major urban centers around teh world is a major problem. what are teh causes of this? how can this problem be solved?

Your next door neighbour owns a small dog that barks throughout the day and the night. Write a letter to your neighbour requesting that something be done about the dog. Include in your letter: ﻿﻿•Your reason for writing ﻿﻿•What you would like to happen ﻿﻿•A nice, respectful style.

The education of young people is the main priority in countries around the world. Some people believe that educating adults who cannot read or write is essential for the society and more funding should be made available for it. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

It is important for people to take risks, both in their professional lives and personal lives. Do you think the advantages of taking risks outweigh the disadvantages?

Your next door neighbour owns a small dog that barks throughout the day and the night. Write a letter to your neighbour requesting that something be done about the dog. Include in your letter: •Your reason for writing •What you would like to happen •A nice, respectful style.