The graph below shows the number of tourists visiting a particular Carribbean island between 2010 and 2017.

The graph below shows the number of tourists visiting a particular Carribbean island between 2010 and 2017.
The line graph illustrates the information
of
Change preposition
on
show examples
the
amount
Change the quantifier
number
show examples
of people who visited a Caribbean
island
from 2010 to 2017.
Overall
, total tourists rose considerably, and those staying on cruise ships increased
in particular
, overtaking
staying
Correct pronoun usage
those staying
show examples
on the
island
itself, which underwent a more moderate increase.
To begin
with, tourists who stayed on
island
Add an article
the island
an island
show examples
instead
of
staing
Correct your spelling
staying
standing
on cruise ships were approximately 0.7
million
in 2010.
Then
this
figure doubled and hit 1.5
million
in the following two years. During the next two years,
this
quantity has remained the same, without any change. The progressive patterns for visitors on cruise ships and the
island
were reflected in substantial gains for
overall
visitors, which started at 1
million
in 2010, grew consistently to 2.7
million
in 2015 before plateauing through 2016 and
then
increasing sharply to 3.5
million
by the end of the period.
Submitted by dlgrmaa9499 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "overall".
Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Replace the words island, million with synonyms.
Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: