People living in the 21st century have a better life quality than people who lived in previous times. to whta extent do you agree or disagree?

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In the era of globalization, technology and the enhancement of healthcare made our life quality improved than past.

However

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, there is a debate about

this

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statement. I have a balanced view of

this

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argument. In

this

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essay, I will elaborate on my point of view. On the one hand, technology plays a critical role in transforming our lives. It helped us to move swiftly and without struggling during travelling.

Moreover

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, The healthcare system changed. New vaccines and antibiotics were raised. These medications assisted us in ameliorating our immunity.

For instance

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, Every newborn obtaining a vaccine.

This

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vaccine protects them from poliomyelitis.

In addition

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, the

food

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now is preserved in better conditions likely in fridges. The cooking system

also

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changed. New ovens released which can cook well and eradicate any poisons or any source of infection.

On the other hand

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, the air now is polluted with gases. We can not sniff fresh air

due to

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the gas emissions from cars and factories.

For example

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, a new study from Chigaco Univesity convinced that the percentage of oxygen in the air now is mitigated

due to

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these emissions.

Furthermore

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, new substances are integrated with

food

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such

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Remove the comma

apply

show examples

artificial colours and preservatives. These harm our digestive system. One of the skyrocketed trends is the junk

food

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. It is contaminated we preservatives and unhealthy fats. In conclusion, we should alleviate the usage of fast foods and

food

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contaminated with preservatives. The government should play a more vibrant role in increasing the citizen's awareness of these hazards and expounding their consequences.

mohannadsmeSun Jul 28 2024

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coherence cohesion

Work on creating a more logical structure within the paragraphs. For example, it would be useful to clearly separate the positive and negative aspects of modern life and link them coherently to the thesis statement.

task achievement

Provide more clear and comprehensive ideas. The points made in the essay are valid but could be expanded with deeper analysis and explanation. Try to provide more specific reasoning and connections between points.

coherence cohesion

The essay includes both an introduction and a conclusion, providing a clear beginning and ending to the discussion. This helps in presenting the argument in a structured manner.

task achievement

The essay addresses both aspects of the question—advantages and disadvantages of living in the 21st century—ensuring a balanced view. This fulfills the task requirements effectively.

task achievement

Examples, such as the vaccination of newborns and the study from the University of Chicago, add relevance and specificity to your points, strengthening the essay’s argument.

11
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meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

255 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

quality of life
technological innovations
life expectancy
preventive measures
educational opportunities
online learning platforms
globalization
economic conditions
social issues
gender equality
human rights
environmental resources
climate change
leisure activities
cultural experiences
mental health awareness
well-being

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People living in the 21st century have a better life quality than people who lived in previous times. to whta extent do you agree or disagree?

You have bought a new laptop computer and in a few days of purchase discovered a major flaw. Write a letter to the company. In your letter – introduce yourself – explain the situation – say what action you would like to company to take.

-It is important for people to take risks, both in their professional lives and their personal lives. Do you think the advantages of taking risks outweigh the disadvantages?

Some museum charge entry fees while others have free entry. Do you think the advantages of charging an entry fee outweight the disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer and include relevant examples from your own knowledge or experiences.