Some believe that going to university is the best route to a successful career. While others believe that is it better to start work straight after high school. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#believe #university #route #career #work #school

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this

current age of development, Education has become a peculiar need for an individual to sustain a healthy life. Certain communities have thought that pursuing higher studies might lead them to travel through their success path.

In contrast

, few folk have a counterproductive opinion on

this

statement,

that is

to start an employment career is more appreciatable than enrolling in higher studies to move their economy towards upside.

This

essay exaggerates both views of the above reasons with relevant examples.

To begin

with, the current generation shows a keen interest in feeding them with enormous knowledge as they believe

this

would help them to reach their target efficiently.

Besides

, the increasing rate of education might reflect in society's well-being where public practice living based on social ethics.

Additionally

, higher literacy

also

lends a helping hand to an individual to achieve greater heights in their career which helps them gain a plethora of insights to groom their professional path. To give a good example, In recent times, most of the corporate industries have persuaded direct recruitments of higher positions by considering the candidate's higher qualification profiles.

Thus

the above explanation depicts the pros of doing a master's study after completing high school.

On the other hand

, certain populations who are on the edge of poverty believe that taking up a job helps them to improve their status and individuality, where they can create a free space to divide into various aspects of life.

Furthermore

, there are a few groups of the public who presume that undergoing practical learning in their workplace is much better than the syllabified curriculum. henceforth moving to the employment phase after schooling helps to get more practical insights based on the domain they are working in and it

also

provides them self self-dependent qualities. In conclusion, either pursuing higher studies or choosing a work career depends on people's perspective they can select their way

according to

their needs.

Moreover

, it is important to stay more reliant throughout their path to gain a successful reward.

Submitted by suwaashaperumal on Mon Nov 27 2023

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Task Achievement

Your essay provides a clear argument with both views and a conclusion stated. However, the introduction and conclusion could be developed further to summarize the main points more effectively and provide a clearer stance. Aim to engage the reader with a hook in the introduction and finish with a strong, memorable statement in the conclusion.

Coherence and Cohesion

The essay demonstrates a basic logical structure, but it could benefit from clearer paragraphing and topic sentences. Each paragraph should start with a clear topic sentence that introduces the main idea. The transition between ideas could be smoother, which will improve the essay's overall readability.

Task Achievement

While you have attempted to support your main points, the essay lacks specific examples. Using concrete examples to illustrate your points is essential. Try to incorporate real-life examples, data, or research studies to substantiate your arguments and make them more persuasive.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

12
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 9.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

338 words

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Some believe that going to university is the best route to a successful career. While others believe that is it better to start work straight after high school. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Fully explain your ideas

The most important aim of sciece should be improve people's lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree this statement ?

Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

When you learn a foreign language, all four skills（listening, reading, speaking and writing) are equally important. To what extent do you agree or disagree？

Motorways help people travel quickly and cover long distances but they also cause problems. What are the problems of motorway and what solutions are there?

In many countries nowadays, consumers can go to a supermarket and buy food produced all over the world. Do you think this is a positive or negative development? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.