Some people believe that air travel should be restricted because it causes serious problems and uses up the world's fuel resources. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #air #travel #world #fuel #resources

Consequently

,some

people

believe that

ait

Correct your spelling

air

show examples

travel

should be restricted because it causes serious problems and uses up the

worlds

Change noun form

world's

show examples

fuel

resources. In general, in

this

essay I want to

eхplane

Correct your spelling

explain

my opinion and what opinion

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

I agree

and

Change preposition

with and

show examples

disagree

Change preposition

with.

show examples

Firstly

, I want to say that I disagree with

this

opinion.I think that

air

traveling its

Wrong verb form

travel

show examples

does not cause serious problems because

its

Correct your spelling

it's

show examples

the safest transport in the world .Yes ,a lot of

fuel

Add a missing verb

is uses

show examples

uses

Replace the word

used

show examples

but safety

need

Correct subject-verb agreement

needs

show examples

some investment. if we restrict

air

traveling

Replace the word

travel

show examples

and because of that

Correct pronoun usage

there

show examples

would be more and more

accident

Fix the agreement mistake

accidents

show examples

because more

people

would

travel

by car because it is

cheepier

Correct your spelling

cheaper

than

train

Add an article

the train

a train

show examples

, so car accidents

became

Wrong verb form

have become

show examples

Correct word choice

common.

show examples

The second reason why

air

traveling

Replace the word

travel

show examples

should not be restricted is because

its

Correct your spelling

it's

show examples

really fast.

For example

you

Correct word choice

if you

show examples

want to visit Georgia and from Russia if you

travel

by car it would take 2 days maximum and if you

travel

by plane

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

it will take only 2 hours. and

its

Replace the word

it's

it is

show examples

really

Correct article usage

a really

show examples

serious reason because

people

want to take minimum time for

this

and the other countries do not have so fast trains like in Japan or so big train system like in Russia because of that

people

should

travel

by plane. In conclusion,I think that there are

not

Correct your spelling

show examples

global reasons why we need to restrict

air

travel

because it

safest

Add a missing verb

is safest

show examples

and fastest than a lot of

transports

Fix the agreement mistake

transport

show examples

And I think a lot of problems with

fuel

can be solved in future

for example

more and more transport

became

Wrong verb form

has become

show examples

like Tesla and they won't need

fuel

Submitted by dulskywork on Sun Jul 28 2024

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task response

You need to make your introduction clearer by directly stating your position on restricting air travel and briefly previewing the main points you will discuss.

coherence and cohesion

The essay could benefit from smoother transitions between ideas to enhance the logical flow.

task response

Some points in your essay are not well-supported with specific examples. Try to include more detailed and relevant examples to strengthen your argument.

coherence and cohesion

Pay attention to minor grammatical errors and typos, such as 'ait' instead of 'air' and 'cheepier' instead of 'cheaper'. These can affect the overall readability.

task response

You have provided a clear stance on the topic, which helps in task achievement.

coherence and cohesion

Your conclusion effectively summarizes your main points and restates your opinion, which is good for coherence.

task response

The essay presents relevant ideas and arguments about the advantages of air travel, such as safety and speed.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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4Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
28Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

261 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people believe that air travel should be restricted because it causes serious problems and uses up the world's fuel resources. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Some children find learning history at school very exciting but many others think it is boring. In what ways can history be brought to life for all school children?

Reserarch show that some activities are good for health and others are bad. Despite knowing that millions of people engage in unhealthy activities. what is the causes of this ? what can be done ?

Marriages are bigger and more expensive nowadays than in the past. Why is this the case? Is it a positive or negative development?

Many governments think that economics progress is there most important goal some people fieber think that other type of progress are equally important for a country discuss both views and give your opinion

What do you think are the causes of this? What can be done to draw people's attention to art? The government's investment in arts, music and theatre is a waste of money. Governments should invest these funds in public services instead.