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Band 5

What are the advantages and disadvantages of leaving your country to live or study abroad.

#country #study
Over the
last
 few years, the number of people who prefer to live or
study
 abroad
have
Change the verb form
has
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 increased significantly.
Although
 there are several advantages
of
Change preposition
to
show examples
 leaving your
country
, it can have some disadvantages as well. In
this
 essay, I will try to discuss both
positive
Correct article usage
the positive
show examples
 and negative sides of
this
 and draw a conclusion.
Firstly
, I would like to discuss several positive aspects of
live
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living
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 or
study
Wrong verb form
studying
show examples
 abroad. The first benefit of it is considered to be that educational opportunities.
For instance
, you can
study
Enternational
Correct your spelling
International
 Institute. So you can find
Add an article
a well
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well paid
Add a hyphen
well-paid
show examples
 job and can create
future
Add an article
a future
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 career. Another positive aspect is thought to be that personal growth.
That is
 because you can learn
foreign
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about foreign
show examples
culture
Fix the agreement mistake
cultures
show examples
 and contact
foreign
Correct article usage
a foreign
show examples
country
's people and you can grow your
world-view
Correct your spelling
worldview
show examples
 and ideology.
Secondly
, I would like to discuss some of
negative
Add an article
the negative
show examples
 aspects of leaving your
country
. One of the major
drawback
Change to a plural noun
drawbacks
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 of it is
that
Correct determiner usage
apply
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homesickness.
For example
, you might miss your family, friends and relatives. So you might want to go to your home and meet them. Another important demerit is
that
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apply
show examples
financial problems. The reason for
this
 is that you might experience
lack
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a lack
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 of money problems because
of
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apply
show examples
studying and living abroad
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
can be expensive. So you have got to work harder. In general, it can be said that leaving your
country
 to live or
study
 abroad can offer several positives,
there
Correct word choice
but there
show examples
 may be some drawbacks too. From my personal point of view,
advantages
Correct article usage
the advantages
show examples
 of it will outweigh the disadvantages.
Submitted by Teo Halimov on

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task achievement
Try to use more specific examples to support your points. For example, mention specific scholarships or exchange programs that can offer financial support.
task achievement
Work on sentence variety and complexity to enhance clarity and comprehension. Consider using more complex sentence structures.
coherence cohesion
Improve transitions between your points to create a smoother flow of ideas. For example, use conjunctions like 'moreover,' 'in addition,' and 'furthermore' to link your ideas more cohesively.
coherence cohesion
Check for grammatical errors and improve sentence structure. For example, 'live or study abroad' should be 'living or studying abroad' in some contexts.
task achievement
Your introduction clearly states the purpose of the essay and sets the context for the discussion.
coherence cohesion
You provided a balanced view by discussing both the advantages and disadvantages of living or studying abroad.
coherence cohesion
Your conclusion effectively summarizes your points and provides a personal viewpoint.
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