IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 2.5

Some people want governments to spend money looking for life on other planets. Others, however, think this is a waste of public money when there are so many problems on earth. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

#people #governments #money #life #planets #waste #earth
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In nowadays
Change preposition
Nowadays
show examples
, we have
a lots
Correct the article-noun agreement
a lot
lots
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 of
environment
Replace the word
environmental
show examples
 problems on
Use synonyms
earth
Capitalize word
Earth
show examples
. A certain number of
people
Use synonyms
, looking for life on other planets. But
other
Correct article usage
the other
show examples
 side of
people
Use synonyms
 think, that
Use synonyms
government
Correct article usage
the government
show examples
 shouldn’t spend money
to
Change preposition
on
show examples
this
Linking Words
, cause
Use synonyms
earth
Correct article usage
the earth
show examples
have
Change the verb form
has
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 other big problems.
This
Linking Words
 is a controversial point, but we can discuss
this
Linking Words
 moment. Environmental problems are not new to the
earth
Use synonyms
. And scientists always
researches
Correct subject-verb agreement
research
show examples
 solutions for
this
Linking Words
 kind of
issues
Fix the agreement mistake
issue
show examples
.
For example
Linking Words
, Overpopulation. Because of
Linking Words
this
Add a comma
this,
show examples
 our
planet
Use synonyms
faced
Add a missing verb
is faced
show examples
 with the problem of resource constraints.
And relocation
Correct word choice
Relocation
show examples
 to another
planet
Use synonyms
 can help to solve
problem
Fix the agreement mistake
problems
show examples
 with water, food
shortage
Fix the agreement mistake
shortages
show examples
 and other necessary resources for living.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, moving to
other
Correct quantifier usage
another
show examples
planet
Use synonyms
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
 not the easiest solution. Because
government
Use synonyms
 should spend to
this
Linking Words
 large money.
For example
Linking Words
, the number of
people
Use synonyms
 on
Use synonyms
earth
Capitalize word
Earth
show examples
 is around 8 billion. And we need technology to transport all of
Linking Words
this
Correct determiner usage
these
show examples
people
Use synonyms
.
Also
Linking Words
,
Use synonyms
government
Add an article
the government
show examples
 should establish infrastructure and
living
Correct article usage
a living
show examples
 environment. Which is hard to do. To summarise, both of
Linking Words
this
Correct determiner usage
these
show examples
 sides had logical reasons, but we should think about every aspect to do something. I believe, that moving to another
planet
Use synonyms
 is
very
Add an article
a very
the very
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 hard idea and wasting of money.
Government
Use synonyms
 should do a
lot’s
Change noun form
lot
show examples
 of things to bring it to life.
Submitted by bellovanina97 on

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task achievement
Try to refine your introduction to clearly present both views without errors. Use phrases like "On one hand..." and "On the other hand..." to highlight the contrasting opinions.
task achievement
Work on developing your ideas more fully. Provide clear examples and explanations related to both views to add depth to your essay.
task achievement
Ensure your main points are well-supported. Instead of general statements, use specific details or data to back up your arguments.
coherence cohesion
Improve your sentence structure and grammar. For instance, "In nowadays" should be "Nowadays" or "In modern times," and "a lot’s" should be "a lot".
coherence cohesion
Enhance your logical structure by using cohesive devices like "Firstly," "Secondly," "Moreover," and "However." This will help in connecting your ideas smoothly.
task achievement
You have acknowledged both perspectives concerning spending on space exploration and addressing earth's problems, which is a good start.
coherence cohesion
You have made an attempt to conclude your essay by summarizing both views and providing your opinion, which is essential for a cohesive piece.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • unprecedented opportunities
  • extraterrestrial
  • satisfy human curiosity
  • practical benefits
  • inspiring goal
  • testament to human ambition
  • pursuit of knowledge
  • critics argue
  • imprudent
  • plague Earth
  • immediate attention
  • allocated for
  • environmental conservation
  • well-being
  • quality of life
  • balanced approach
  • advancements
  • benefits for humanity
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