Some people argue that spending a lot of money holding birthday parties, wedding parties and other celebration is a waste of money. However, others believe such parties are important for individuals and for society. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Some people argue that spending a lot of money on birthday
parties
, wedding
parties
, and other
celebrations
is a waste of money.
However
, others believe
such
parties
are important for individuals and for society. Discuss both views and give your own opinion. The debate over whether spending large amounts of money on
celebrations
is wasteful or valuable is one that reflects differing perspectives on the role of social
events
in our lives. On one hand, critics of extravagant spending on
celebrations
argue that it is a misuse of resources. They point out that
events
such
as birthday
parties
and weddings often involve considerable expenditure on items like decorations, catering, and entertainment, which may be used briefly and
then
discarded.
This
viewpoint emphasizes that the funds spent on
such
events
could be redirected towards more practical or philanthropic purposes,
such
as supporting charitable causes or investing in personal development.
Additionally
, critics argue that the time and effort spent planning and attending these
events
might be better utilized in productive activities that contribute to personal or societal advancement.
Conversely
, proponents of spending on
celebrations
argue that
such
events
hold significant value for individuals and society. They believe that
celebrations
mark important life milestones and offer opportunities for people to strengthen social connections and build lasting memories. For many, these
events
provide a chance to share
joy
Add an article
the joy
show examples
with loved ones, fostering a sense of community and personal
fulfillment
Change the spelling
fulfilment
show examples
. The cultural and social importance of these gatherings can
also
play a role in reinforcing societal bonds and traditions, making the financial outlay seem justified to those who value these experiences. In my opinion,
while
it is important to appreciate the role of
celebrations
in enhancing personal and social well-being, there is merit in adopting a balanced approach. Hosting
celebrations
with a reasonable budget allows individuals to enjoy these moments without undue financial strain. Allocating any remaining resources to charitable causes or future savings can provide a practical balance between celebrating life’s milestones and maintaining financial responsibility.
Submitted by niteshrayamajhi542 on

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task achievement
While the essay presents a clear discussion of both viewpoints, it would benefit from the inclusion of more specific examples to illustrate the points made. Including specific scenarios or anecdotes can make the arguments more relatable and impactful.
task achievement
Ensure all main points are supported with relevant evidence. For instance, mentioning specific cultural traditions or societal benefits could strengthen the argument.
coherence cohesion
The essay is well-organized and easy to follow, but a clearer transition between discussing both views could improve coherence. Consider using more transitional phrases to link ideas smoothly.
coherence cohesion
Ensure a consistent balance between the points supporting each view. The opposition's viewpoint could be elaborated further to provide a more comprehensive discussion.
introduction conclusion present
The essay has a clear and engaging introduction that sets the stage for the discussion effectively.
introduction conclusion present
The conclusion is well-crafted and succinctly summarizes the main points while providing a balanced personal opinion.
logical structure
The logical structure of the essay is solid, with a clear division between the discussion of both viewpoints.
clear comprehensive ideas
The ideas are clearly articulated, making the arguments easy to understand and follow.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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