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Band 7

Many feel that the common educational system of teachers and students in a classroom will be replaced by the year 2050. Do you agree with this view? Give your opinion.

#system #teachers #students #classroom #year
There is an argument if the current in-person
classes
 will be modified into virtual or hybrid
classes
. In my opinion,
this
 thing is inevitable
due to
 technological advancement and hectic life in metropolises.
Therefore
, in
this
 essay, I will shed light on my perspective in
this
 regard. To commence with, technology has changed all aspects of our lives , especially our communication means.
For instance
, I as an employee of a multinational pharmaceutical company, can participate in several remote meetings by some tools including Zoom and Google Meet. Definitely, many
classes
also
 could be held by these applications and provide pupils around the world the opportunity to attend and take benefits of high-quality training, simultaneously. Needless to mention, in recent years
this
 trend has been accelerated
due to
 Coved-19 pandemic. As there are various tools to pave the way for digital communication,
consequently
 it is predictable that the type of educational
classes
 will be changed.
Furthermore
, traffic and air pollution will force human beings to follow their tasks remotely in the near future. Even now many parents prefer to enroll their children in virtual
classes
due to
 their busy schedules. So I believe that
this
 concept would be accepted and welcomed by guardians of students.
In other words
, to avoid common issues of urban life
such
 as traffic and contamination, the majority of individuals would like to work or educate from home. In a nutshell, in
this
technology
Replace the word
technological
show examples
 era, the type everything including the educational system could be affected by new progress.
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task achievement
Your essay provides a complete response to the prompt and clearly communicates your opinion. However, it would be beneficial to elaborate further on some points to give a more comprehensive argument.
coherence cohesion
The logical structure of your essay is generally clear, but some ideas need to be more effectively linked together. Using more transition words could help improve the flow.
task achievement
Your examples are relevant, but adding more specific examples or expanding on the current ones could make your argument more convincing.
task achievement
Your introduction clearly states your opinion and sets the stage for your argument.
coherence cohesion
You have a clear introduction and conclusion, which frames your essay well.
task achievement
You provided relevant examples that support your main points, making your essay more impactful.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • artificial intelligence (AI)
  • machine learning
  • online learning platforms
  • virtual reality (VR)
  • personalized AI tutors
  • tailored educational experiences
  • human interaction
  • mentor
  • inspire
  • psychological needs
  • group discussions
  • teamwork
  • social aspects of learning
  • critical life skills
  • digital-only format
  • hybrid model
  • educational accessibility
  • personalization
  • facilitating learning
  • curiosity
  • innovation
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