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Writing Samples
Band 7.5

Some experts believe that it is better for children to begin learning a foreign language at primary school rather than secondary school.

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In recent years, there has been a significant rise in the number of experts advocating for
children
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to begin
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 learning a foreign
language
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 at primary
school
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 rather than secondary
school
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. It is argued by some that
this
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 shift is positive,
while
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 it is contended by others that negative implications. From my perspective,
while
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 early
language
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 learning offers considerable
advantages
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, challenges that must be carefully considered are
also
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 presented. To start with, the merits of early
language
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 learning can be highlighted for two reasons.
Firstly
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, it is noted that young
children
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 possess a higher degree of neuroplasticity, which allows new languages to be absorbed more naturally and efficiently.
For example
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, it has been shown in studies that
children
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 who begin learning a
language
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 at a younger age achieve greater fluency and native-like pronunciation compared to those who start later.
This
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 being the case, it can be assumed that if foreign languages are introduced in primary
school
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,
children
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 will benefit from their brain’s heightened ability to learn new languages and achieve higher proficiency levels and cognitive
advantages
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.
However
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, despite these
advantages
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, some disadvantages should be acknowledged. One potential issue is the additional pressure placed on young
children
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 who are already adjusting to the fundamental subjects of math, reading, and writing.
This
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 perspective is supported by examples of students feeling overwhelmed and stressed by the added responsibility of learning a foreign
language
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 at
such
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 a young age.
Hence
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, it is apparent that increased stress and anxiety among
children
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 can be caused by the introduction of a foreign
language
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 in primary
school
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.
This
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 can be attributed to the fact that young learners may find it challenging to manage multiple subjects simultaneously, which can be detrimental to their
overall
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 academic performance and well-being. In conclusion,
while
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 the importance of early
language
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 learning is evident
due to
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 its cognitive benefits and enhanced
language
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 acquisition abilities, the potential drawbacks cannot be overstated. A balanced approach that encompasses both the
advantages
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 of early
language
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 learning and the need to manage the pressure on young students is essential for the sustainable development of
language
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 education, ensuring that
children
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 benefit without being overwhelmed.

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relevant specific examples
Ensure that the examples provided are as specific and detailed as possible. This will help to strengthen your argument and support your main points more effectively.
logical structure
Although the essay is logically structured, incorporating transitional phrases more frequently can enhance the flow between paragraphs and ideas.
introduction conclusion present
The introduction and conclusion are both clear and present. They frame the essay effectively, making the central argument easy to follow.
clear comprehensive ideas
Your ideas are clear, comprehensive, and you provide a balanced viewpoint. This demonstrates strong critical thinking skills.
logical structure
Your essay displays a logical structure with well-supported main points, making it cohesive and easy to read.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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