International travel and tourism have become easier and more affordable. Is this a positive or a negative development? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience

These days
travel
become
easily more
Correct word choice
easier
show examples
than before . So , some people think that better development ,
While
others believe that
travel
more
exoensive
Correct your spelling
expensive
.
This
essay will discuss both sides and will draw my personal opinion .
In
Change preposition
On
show examples
one
Correct article usage
the one
show examples
hand , a
l ot
Correct your spelling
lot
show examples
of people think the
developments
not
Add a missing verb
are not
show examples
good .
In addition
, they
are
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
argue because can not buy a ticket . So ,
thats
Correct your spelling
that's
show examples
why some think that
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
negative
with
Change preposition
about
show examples
travel
. because the money
so
Add a missing verb
is so
show examples
expensive with
developments
, and not anyone can get the money for
travel
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
anywhere .
Also
maybe become some issues for the journey
becasie
Correct your spelling
because
became
a long time . On
other
Correct article usage
the other
show examples
hand , some people think the
developments
Fix the agreement mistake
development
show examples
of
travel
is
Add an article
a benefit
show examples
benefit
Replace the word
beneficial
show examples
for
a
Correct the article-noun agreement
apply
show examples
multiple reasons
Add the comma(s)
, for example,
show examples
for example
they can
comfortable
Add a missing verb
be comfortable
show examples
in
Change preposition
with
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
travel
with new
developments
.
Moreover
, they can eat
some thing
Correct your spelling
something
show examples
on the plane if they feel
hangury
Correct your spelling
hungry
hangry
angry
.
Also
can sleep if the journey
take
Change the verb form
takes
show examples
more time or a
lot
Add the preposition
lot of
show examples
time . they can have good services on the plane .
Henec
Correct your spelling
Hence
the belief that good feature the
travel
services give to us . In conclusion , after analysis of both point
view
Change preposition
of view
show examples
,
iam
Correct your spelling
I am
positive
travel
Change preposition
about travel
show examples
. So ,
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
believe that
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
travel
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
very important in our life .
Submitted by shougaldhafere on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
Ensure that you address both sides of the argument with more clarity and develop each point thoroughly. Provide more specific and relevant examples to support your arguments.
coherence
Improve the logical flow of your essay. Make sure each paragraph connects well with the next and that ideas are presented in a clear and organized manner.
cohesion
Work on using linking words and phrases to increase coherence and cohesion in your writing. This will help your essay flow better from one point to the next.
overall
Pay attention to grammatical accuracy and lexical resource use to avoid small mistakes that may disrupt the reader's understanding.
introduction/conclusion
The essay includes an introduction and conclusion, which helps to frame the argument.
task achievement
The writer makes an effort to present both sides of the argument, which shows a balanced approach.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • cross-cultural exchanges
  • sustainable tourism
  • economic stimulus
  • cultural heritage preservation
  • ecotourism
  • global citizenship
  • carbon footprint
  • over-tourism
  • accessible travel
  • lifelong learning
What to do next:
Look at other essays: