Many governments think that economic progress is their most important goal. Some people, however, think that other type of progress are equally important for a country. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Economic
progress
has often been regarded as the foremost goal for governments.
However
, some argue that other forms of
development
,
such
as social, environmental, and cultural
progress
, are equally crucial. In my opinion, these aspects are complementary and should be pursued together to ensure a holistic approach to national
development
. Economic
progress
is undeniably significant as it leads to improved living standards, job creation, and increased revenue for public services.
For instance
, the economic growth in the United Arab Emirates has resulted in remarkable infrastructure
development
and higher living standards for its citizens.
However
, focusing solely on economic growth can lead to environmental degradation and social inequalities. Rapid industrialization,
for example
, often results in increased pollution and depletion of natural resources, which can harm public health and well-being. Social and environmental
progress
are equally important for a country's
development
. Education, healthcare, and social justice are critical components of social
development
that contribute to a harmonious society.
For example
, Qatar has invested heavily in its education and healthcare systems, leading to significant improvements in public health and literacy rates. Environmental sustainability is
also
crucial, as seen in Saudi Arabia’s efforts
in promoting
Change preposition
to promote
show examples
renewable energy to reduce its reliance on imported energy. The importance of these aspects varies for each country, depending on their unique circumstances and needs. In some nations, addressing social inequalities may be more urgent than in others where environmental issues are more pressing. In conclusion,
while
economic
progress
is crucial for a country's
development
, it should not be pursued at the expense of other forms of
progress
. Based on my experiences, governments should strive to create policies that address all these areas and prioritize
based
Correct pronoun usage
them based
show examples
on their social necessity to ensure a prosperous future.
Submitted by m.ali.gholamalian on

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task achievement
The essay provides a thorough and balanced discussion on the topic, addressing both views clearly.
task achievement
Consider adding a few more specific examples to further strengthen your arguments.
coherence cohesion
The essay follows a logical structure with clear transitions between points, enhancing readability.
coherence cohesion
The conclusion effectively summarizes the main points, but could reiterate your opinion more strongly
task achievement
Your ideas are supported well with relevant examples, which makes your arguments more convincing.
introduction conclusion present
The introduction sets the context and presents a clear opinion, setting a strong foundation for the essay
logical structure
You have used appropriate transitions to link different paragraphs, which helps in maintaining coherence.
supported main points
Relevant examples, such as those of the UAE and Qatar, are used effectively to support your points.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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