In recent years, more and more people are choosing to read e-books rather than paper books. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

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In today’s world, many nations are choosing to read online
books
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rather than paper
books
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. In my opinion, I believe that
e-
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books
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can bring about more advantages for
people
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compared to any problems they might bring. Despite the drawbacks, I believe the benefits gained by reading
e-
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books
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are extremely useful to individuals' lives.
Firstly
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,
people
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can read the materials easily.
In other words
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, if they read
books
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online, they can simply zoom in on the words if they cannot see clearly.
For example
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, in China, many old
people
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prefer reading from their phones because they can see the letters clearly.
As a result
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,
this
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will provide a great reading experience for them.
Secondly
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, some
e-
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books
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come with voice features.
This
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can be absolutely great for someone who wants to improve their pronunciation
while
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reading a book. Admittedly, there are some issues involved when
people
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read
e-
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books
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. One problem is that it is dangerous for their health, especially for old
people
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.
That is
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to say, if they read
books
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online on the computer or phone, it will affect their eyes or give them a headache.
For instance
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, these days, many
people
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use online
books
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, and when you see them, you will see their health is so bad because they are always in front of computers or phones.
Therefore
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,
this
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is very dangerous for their health. Another negative aspect is technical issues.
This
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is because if they have issues with their internet, it will prevent them from reading online.
To sum up
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, reading the materials easily and the availability of voice features far outweigh any of the minor drawbacks that could result from reading
e-
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books
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.

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coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph has a clear central idea. While the essay is generally well-organized, some points could be elaborated more thoroughly.
task achievement
Provide more specific examples and data to support your arguments; this will strengthen your points and make your essay more convincing.
coherence cohesion
Introduction and conclusion are present and clearly stated, which helps frame the essay well.
task achievement
The essay addresses the task by discussing both advantages and disadvantages of e-books, and gives a clear opinion.
coherence cohesion
The overall structure of the essay is logical and flows well from one point to the next.
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