IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

You have bought a new camera but when you got it home you found it had some problems. You returned the camera and spoke to the company representative a week ago but the camera has still not been repaired. Write a letter to the company. In your letter: • introduce yourself • explain the situation • say what action you would like the company to take.

Dear Sir/Madam I am writing
this
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 letter in order to complain about the faulty
camera
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 in my recent purchase from your
company
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,
as well as
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 recommending the action
the
Remove the article
apply
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your
company
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 should take. I am Nilufar, one of your loyal customers. I have been living in Uzbekistan since I was born. And I always buy products from your
company
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. Two weeks ago, I purchased a new
camera
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 for my brother which was supposed to be
birthday
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a birthday
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 gift from your
company
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.
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However
Add a comma
However,
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 when I got it home I discovered it had some problems.
Then
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 I returned the
camera
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 and spoke to the
company
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 representative a week ago. I am really disappointed with the
company
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 service because the
camera
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 has still not been prepared. As a regular
customer
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customer,
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 I am particularly disappointed by
this
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 delay.
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Moreover
Add a comma
Moreover,
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 I have not
facing
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faced
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issue
Correct article usage
an issue
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 like that before my
last
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purchace
Correct your spelling
purchase
.
Therefore
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 I suggest that you replace the
camera
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for
Change preposition
with
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 another which works well. I look forward to receiving the replacement soon. Yours faithfully Nilufar Sharipova

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coherence cohesion
Some sentences could be clearer and more concise for better readability. For instance, 'I am writing this letter in order to complain about the faulty camera in my recent purchase from your company, as well as recommending the action the your company should take.' could be simplified and divided into two sentences.
task achievement
Overall, your letter responds well to the prompt and provides appropriate details such as who you are, what the problem is, and what you want the company to do. However, it might help to provide a bit more detail about the problem with the camera to strengthen your case.
task achievement
You have effectively introduced yourself and explained the situation clearly.
task achievement
Your letter is polite and maintains a suitable tone throughout, which is very appropriate for this context.
coherence cohesion
The structure of the letter is logical, with each paragraph focusing on a single idea.
coherence cohesion
Your greeting and closing are well-formulated and fit the formal nature of the letter.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • company representative
  • malfunction
  • repair
  • defect
  • disappointment
  • timeline
  • replacement
  • refund
  • purchased
  • return policy
  • customer service
  • satisfaction
  • issue
  • product quality
  • communication
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