In some countries, a few people earn extremely high salaries. Some people think that this is good for a country, while others believe that the government should control salaries and limit the amount that people can earn.Discuss both views and give your opinion.
In the drive to produce a better world, there
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
conflicting
regarding whether the authorities should let the people be paid higher wages or restrict them. I believe that individuals should Replace the word
conflict
be received
a good amount of payment.
From one point of view, it is Wrong verb form
receive
a
significant to ensure a stronger economy in the country. In Change the article
apply
such
situations, by making sure the professionals are being paid with a reasonable amount of money. For instance
, If the wage is higher , more and more people will paying
the taxes. As for the taxable income, Change the verb form
pay
be paying
this
helps the government to build more infrastrutures
Correct your spelling
infrastructures
infrastructure
such
as healthcare centra
and education. Correct your spelling
centres
Therefore
, I believe this
will surely helps
the territory to grow and advance. Change the verb form
help
Not to mention
, third-world
country. Correct article usage
a third-world
Thus
, a long-term effect, this
might be useful for Correct pronoun usage
apply
the
future generations and the prosperity of the community.
Correct article usage
apply
On the other hand
, some might argue that an inequality between the poor and the rich. For example
, if a wealthy person get
Change the verb form
gets
big salaries
than the needy, the poorest individuals will become Fix the agreement mistake
a higher salary
more poor
. Replace the words
poorer
However
, I totally disagree with the social stigma because every hard-working workers
Change to a singular noun
worker
are deserved
a decent wage. Wrong verb form
deserves
Hence
, if the highly-skilled workers not getting
Wrong verb form
get
a good
Correct the article-noun agreement
good condition incentives
a good condition incentive
condition
Fix the agreement mistake
conditions
incentives
, Correct word choice
and incentives
this
results in many with emigrate
to other Wrong verb form
emigrating
country
or conflict between the societies.
In conclusion, Fix the agreement mistake
countries
although
there is a disagreement in the nation regarding the payment, I strongly believe that people should be paid on behalf of their hard work, while
investing on
the interests of the economy and Change preposition
in
next
generations.Correct article usage
the next
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coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph focuses on one main idea, making it easier for the reader to follow your argument. Try to use better transitions between different points to achieve a smoother flow.
task achievement
Work on providing clearer examples that are closely linked to the main points you are making. This will help support your argument more effectively.
general
Avoid grammatical errors and awkward phrasing to ensure clarity. For example, avoid sentences like "individuals should be received..." and instead use "individuals should receive..."
task achievement
Your ideas are clear and you do touch upon both sides of the argument, but ensure each point is thoroughly developed.
task achievement
You have provided a clear opinion on the topic within the introduction, which is crucial for task achievement.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion, fulfilling the requirements for coherence and cohesion.
task achievement
The argument concerning the economic benefits of higher salaries is logically sound and valid.
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