Some people think that children should begin their formal education at a very early age. Some think they should begin at least 7 years old. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

#people #children #education #age #think #years

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Nowadays people have two different views about

Use synonyms

education

Add an article

the education

show examples

system,some individuals believe that infants should start their formal

education

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quite young,

while

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others argue that they should begin after turning seven years old.

this

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essay,

discuss

Correct subject-verb agreement

discusses

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both sides of the argument and

explain

Correct subject-verb agreement

explains

show examples

why I totally agree

with

Change preposition

apply

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that formal

education

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should begin at least 7 years old. On the one hand, those who support the idea of starting

education

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earlier than usual argue that

this

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is very important for the fundamental development of the child, allowing him to acquire several necessary skills.

In addition

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, many scientists have researched that children learn faster by comparing them to a sponge. They claim that

this

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phenomenon is

due to

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an unrealized brain and the ability to form multiple connections through experience.

On the other hand

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, proponents of starting the educational process after the age of seven believe that

this

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allows children to develop individually and physically.

Following

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this

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plan can be of great benefit in terms of establishing strong connections with peers and learning valuable skills that you won't learn in school,

such

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as budgeting and self-sufficiency.

In addition

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, the child may not be as hyperactive as he might have been at an earlier age.

To sum up

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this

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essay,

discussed

Wrong verb form

discusses

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both of

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this

Correct determiner usage

these

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views and

explained

Wrong verb form

explains

show examples

why I totally agree

with

Change preposition

apply

show examples

that formal

education

Use synonyms

should begin at least 7 years old.

Submitted by makemoneyizzy16 on Wed Aug 07 2024

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coherence cohesion

Improve the logical flow of ideas within and between paragraphs. Ensure that each paragraph smoothly transitions to the next, maintaining a clear and consistent thread throughout the essay.

coherence cohesion

Expand on the introduction and conclusion to firmly outline and wrap up the key points discussed. Make your stance more explicitly clear and provide a stronger summary in the conclusion.

task achievement

Provide more specific examples to back up your points. Detail what skills children may gain or miss out on by starting formal education earlier or later. This will make your arguments more compelling and concrete.

task achievement

The essay addresses both viewpoints, presenting arguments for starting education early and for starting at age seven.

coherence cohesion

The conclusion restates the main viewpoints and the author's opinion, providing closure to the essay.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

225 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

cognitive development
social development
structured learning environments
essential skills
reading, writing, and arithmetic
social norms
undue stress and pressure
natural curiosity and creativity
unstructured play
emotional and psychological development
mature
rigors of formal education
natural developmental timeline
life skills
decision-making
problem-solving
informal learning
structured educational system

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Some people think that children should begin their formal education at a very early age. Some think they should begin at least 7 years old. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

Some people think that the success of life is based on hard work and determination. Others, however, believe that there are important factors, such as having money or a good appearance. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

in some coutries an increasing number of people are suffering from health problems as a result of eating too much fast food. It is therefore necessary for governments to impose a higher tax on this kind of food. to what extend do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

A growing number of people rely on restaurants and convenience food (frozen food and packaged meals) rather than home-cooked food to supply most of their meals. What are the advantages and disadvantages of eating this way?

Some people think that enjoying the present is more important than planning for the future for both countries and individuals. To what extent do you agree or disagree?