IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Some people think paying taxes is a big enough contribution to their society, while others think people have more responsibilities as members of society than only paying taxes. Discuss both of these views and give your opinion.

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This
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 is an argument about the
responsibilities
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 of citizens to
society
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, some
people
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 believe that paying
taxes
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 is the only responsibility as a member of
society
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,
while
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 I agree with others who argue that
people
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 have more
responsibilities
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 beyond just paying
taxes
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. Some say that paying
taxes
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 is necessary for funding public
services
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.
This
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 means that if
people
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 pay their
taxes
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, they may receive essential
services
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,
such
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 as health care, education, infrastructure, and public safety. These
services
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 may benefit
society
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 as a whole and contribute to the
overall
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 well-being of citizens and as well they likely can obtain some facilities,
for example
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, when a person becomes ill, use of medicine
services
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 with less cost for cure.
On the other hand
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, there are some tacit rules that if the
people
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 follow them the
society
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 will develop.
For example
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,
responsibilities
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 beyond paying
taxes
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 active participation in community service and volunteering can address local issues more directly and effectively than
taxes
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 alone. Volunteering builds stronger communities and promotes social cohesion.
Furthermore
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, engaging in political processes,
such
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 as voting, attending town meetings, and participating in civil discourse, ensures that citizens have a say in governance and policy-making. As well, acts of kindness,
such
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 as helping neighbours, mentoring youth, or supporting local businesses, contribute to a more resilient and compassionate
society
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.
additionally
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, advocating for social justice, environmental sustainability, and human rights can drive societal progress and address issues that
taxes
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 alone cannot solve.
As a result
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,
although
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 it is not enough to pay
taxes
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 to be a responsible member of
society
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; other contributions and
responsibilities
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 must
also
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 be fulfilled, I strongly agree that having
responsibilities
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 in
society
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 is crucial and impressive.

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task achievement
Ensure that each paragraph has a clear central idea and that examples directly support your points.
coherence cohesion
Improve the logical flow between paragraphs and ideas to enhance overall coherence.
task achievement
The essay addresses both sides of the argument, which is a good demonstration of understanding the task requirements.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion effectively frame the essay and present a clear opinion.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Contribution to society
  • Public services
  • Community involvement
  • Democratic participation
  • Environmental sustainability
  • Local economy
  • Cultural understanding
  • Voting rights
  • Volunteer work
  • Responsible citizenship
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