Some people think young people should be required to have full time education until they are at least 18 years old. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Education plays a pivotal role in our lives, and being able to acquire all the information from the school is definitely an advantage.
However
, it seems extremely exhausting to be obliged to study all the time as a juvenile.
Firstly
, the person who had filled-in
timetable may be in Correct article usage
a filled-in
absence
of communication skills which are required to work in a company or group of people. Correct article usage
the absence
For instance
, employer
may require them Fix the agreement mistake
employers
networking
Change the verb form
to network
within
a group of skilled people which, in turn, demands Change preposition
with
a communication skills
they lack. Correct the article-noun agreement
communication skills
a communication skill
Thus
, it may lead to joblessness. Secondly
, not having enough fun and adrenaline as a child and being forced to gain a lot of knowledge may lead body
to become Correct article usage
the body
emotionless
machine of working, and Add an article
an emotionless
the emotionless
therefore
they may have no sufficient interaction abilities to make friends and having
nobody by their side to rely on. Wrong verb form
have
Finally
, having overloaded
curriculum can bring less job Correct article usage
an overloaded
satisfaction
within a character, which may have bad consequences, such
as increasing
number of Correct article usage
an increasing
suicide
, depression, and less life Fix the agreement mistake
suicides
satisfaction
.
Admittedly, it is true that full-time education may also
have numerous beneficial aftermaths if it is used properly. Specifically, increasing country's
average number of successful students and its bright future, breakthroughs in Correct article usage
the country's
educational
system, and Add an article
the educational
overall
development of our civilization.
Ultimately, it appears that skillful
use of knowledge may have a number of advantages in Change the spelling
skilful
academic
field, despite the possible risks. Add an article
the academic
Nevertheless
, social skills and job satisfaction
are more demanded qualifications in overall
life satisfaction
.Submitted by talgattan4ez on
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relevant specific examples
Expand on the examples provided to add depth to arguments. For instance, provide specific scenarios or studies that show how full-time education impacts communication skills or job satisfaction.
logical structure
Ensure that each paragraph has a clear central idea and that the supporting points are directly related to it. This will enhance the clarity and coherence of your essay.
introduction conclusion present
To strengthen your conclusion, briefly summarize the main points you have discussed in your essay. This can help reinforce your argument and leave a lasting impression on the reader.
introduction conclusion present
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which effectively frame your argument.
logical structure
The main points are logically structured, first discussing the drawbacks of continuous education and then presenting its benefits.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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