Some people think history has little or nothing to offer, while others say the study of the past helps us understand the present. Discuss both viewpoints and give your opinion.

#people #history #offer #study #viewpoints

People have different views about whether studying history is useful or it is

Correct article usage

a compeletly

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compeletly

Correct your spelling

completely

waste of time.

While

there has been a great change in the way we live on

this

planet, still I believe there's a lot we can learn about current

time

Fix the agreement mistake

times

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by studying history. On

one

Correct article usage

the one

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hand, with the advancement of science and

technology

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technology,

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our lifestyle has faced extreme change from the past. We have learnt a lot about the whole universe and we have made specific devices to meet our needs. With

todays

Change to a genitive case

today's

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knowledge and tools it is obvious that some solutions that our ancestors used aren't useful or even valid anymore.

Also

Add a comma

Also,

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our careless behaviour toward

this

planet

have

Change the verb form

has

show examples

caused the whole climate to change and

therefore

there are many problems that

they

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

never existed before.

On the other hand

, there are several advantages

Change preposition

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learning about the past.

Firstly

, it is said

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

that history repeats itself. It is believed that people will act the same in similar situations, so if you don't learn your lessons you will possibly repeat your mistake.

For

example

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example,

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it is important to understand what reasons caused wars in the past.

Secondly

, by learning the process that things went through to reach their current state, we can improve them.

Finally

, it is important to know where are we from

and

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

how are ancients lived and what sort of things they valued. In conclusion, I believe

eventhough

Correct your spelling

even though

we are living differently from our ancestors, learning about how they used to live will help us avoid repeating their wrongs and improving their good works.

Submitted by parsaj1381 on Sat Aug 10 2024

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relevant specific examples

Try to include more specific examples to support your argument. For example, mentioning specific historical events that have provided lessons for modern society would strengthen your essay.

clear comprehensive ideas

Work on varying your sentence structure. More complex sentences and a mix of simple and compound sentences can enhance readability and emphasize key points.

complete response

Pay attention to minor grammar and vocabulary errors to improve clarity. For instance, "compeletly" should be "completely," and "eventhough" should be "even though."

introduction conclusion present

Your introduction and conclusion are clear and effectively frame the essay, making your stance on the topic evident.

logical structure

The logical structure of your essay is quite strong. Each paragraph has a clear focus, and your ideas flow naturally from one to the next.

complete response

The essay covers both viewpoints comprehensively, providing a balanced discussion on the usefulness of studying history.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
14Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

263 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

anachronistic
cultural heritage
perspective
historical context
societal norms
contemporary
evolution
progress
modern advancements
conflicts
tensions
academic
practical skills
subjective
victors
marginalized groups
dwelling on the past
irrelevant

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Some people think history has little or nothing to offer, while others say the study of the past helps us understand the present. Discuss both viewpoints and give your opinion.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

It is argued that mobile phones and other electronic devices have no place in the classroom. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this view?

Some people believe that violence in the media, such as in television programs and films, directly results in violent behaviour. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Popular events like the World Cup and other international sporting occasions are essential in easing international tensions and releasing patriotic emotions in a safe way to what extend do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

In many countries plastic shopping bags are the main source of rubbish, causing pollution on land and in the water, so people think they should be banned. To what extent do you agree or disagree?