Despite better access to education, many adults today still cannot read or write. In what ways are they disadvantaged? What can governments do to help them?
In our modern world,
although
governments
have taken plenty of measures to help citizens access education, many adults
today are still illiterate. This
essay will shed light on the drawbacks of this
trend before suggesting some feasible solutions that authorities can implement.
I have to acknowledge that illiterate people
can face lots of consequences. First and foremost, this
tendency will hinder their personal growth. Without the ability to read documents, books and other materials with accumulated knowledge, individuals will be unable to broaden their minds about some aspects of today’s world, such
as financial hubs, politics or even their potential. This
will stifle their personal growth and impede their goal development. Moreover
, there will be a decrease in the employee rate and that country’s economic situation, and it can also
lead to a higher risk of criminals. Because most criminals come from illiterate backgrounds, society may become worse if this
trend continues.
However
, governments
can do
two main solutions to put an end to Verb problem
find
this
tendency. Perhaps one of these is providing education to people
who live in remote areas. According to
a
research from Vietnam News, Remove the article
apply
people
who live in rural and mountainous areas seem to have a higher rate of being unable to read and write. So the government can invest in education in these areas and build more schools suitable for illiterate adults
. The second solution that authorities can deal with is to create flexible study schedules for adults
and also
subsidize their tuition. If some adults
are stuck in their class schedules, governments
can provide them with online classes, which are more convenient for people
to learn regardless of their geographic distance. Furthermore
, some individuals may be ashamed of their family budgets, so authorities can encourage these people
by supporting their tuition fees. The above things can partly contribute to reducing illiteracy in adults
.
In conclusion, there are plenty of consequences that a lack of reading and writing skills in adults
can cause to themselves and to society. However
, I believe that governments
can implement the aforementioned solutions to deal with this
problem.Submitted by weezel on
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complete response
Your essay is well-structured, and your points are clearly articulated. However, try to make sure that all your points are equally supported with relevant examples. For example, when you mention that increased illiteracy can lead to a higher crime rate, providing more specific statistics or studies to back up that claim would strengthen your argument.
logical structure
Your essay flows logically and is easy to follow. To further enhance coherence, consider using more sophisticated linking phrases and transitional words to improve the fluidity between your points and paragraphs.
relevant specific examples
You provide good examples, but adding a bit more detail or different types of examples (anecdotal, statistical) could further substantiate your arguments. For instance, when discussing flexible study schedules, you might mention specific online platforms that have been successful.
introduction conclusion present
Excellent introduction and conclusion which clearly state your main points and wrap up your argument succinctly.
clear comprehensive ideas
You effectively address the task and cover all necessary points in detail.
logical structure
Logical progression of your essay makes it easy to understand and engaging to read.
Answer the 'Advantages and Disadvantages' topic
IELTS advantages and disadvantages questions normally give you a statement and ask you to comment on the advantages and disadvantages of that statement.
Answer structure for the type of essay
- Introduction
- Body paragraph 1 – advantages
- Body paragraph 2 – disadvantages
- Conclusion
Examples to start your body paragraph:
- The main advantage is...
- The disadvantage of this...
- The main benefit...
- Despite these advantages...
- One possible drawback...
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