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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Some think that printed books are not necessary in the digital era, because all writing can be stored electronically. Others think printed books still play an important role. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

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While
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 some people believe that nowadays, digital forms of
books
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 can work as printed ones, there are individuals thinking that printed
books
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 are still significant. In my opinion, even though possessing
books
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 in a library feels good, book manufacturing requires the cutting of
the
Change the article
a
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 large number of trees.
Books
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 have been invaluable treasures of the people who are fond of reading. Booklovers even enjoy turning pages. For them, handing a book unplugs them from reality and offers a fantastic state of mind.
Moreover
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,
although
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 some of them do not read all of their
books
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, just because they like to possess them, they keep
books
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 in a library. Maybe
books
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 are just a show-off or decor of the home. But, there is a fact that
books
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 help to feel better.
However
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 bookworms are tempted by the lovely smell of paper,
it
Correct pronoun usage
which
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 has a massive cost, which is killing trees. Humankind has already vanished a crucial amount of forested areas for various reasons. Only the Harry Potter series,
for instance
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, were caused to cut over 1 billion trees around the world.
This
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 cruel destruction can be alleviated by making audio and digital
books
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 more popular.
Besides
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, as everyone is so busy with their own mobile phones, it should not be so hard to get used to digital
books
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. In conclusion, possessing and handling
books
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 provide unique feelings to people who are in love with
books
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.
However
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, as printed
books
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 require a lot of raw materials, reading digital forms of
books
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 is way better option for the sake of forests.

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task achievement
Your essay covers both views well and provides a clear opinion. However, you could strengthen the argument by offering more specific examples and detailed points to support your opinion.
coherence cohesion
The essay is logically structured with an introduction and a conclusion that restates your stance. However, work on the transitions between points to improve the overall flow and make your arguments more cohesive.
coherence cohesion
You have a clear introduction and conclusion which help frame your essay well.
task achievement
Your writing covers both sides of the argument effectively and provides a personal opinion, fulfilling the task requirements.
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