Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or a negative development? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience
Recently,
children
have spent time too much on their Use synonyms
smartphones
. Use synonyms
This
case happens because Linking Words
smartphones
have become a fundamental necessity. Use synonyms
This
essay will discuss the positive impacts Linking Words
such
as enhancing their knowledge and the negative effects to be unproductive people.
Linking Words
To begin
, sophisticated technology can enrich Linking Words
children
’s knowledge Use synonyms
due to
the wealth of information there. These devices give more significant development to Linking Words
children
because they can access educational platforms easily Use synonyms
such
as mathematics e-books, science e-journals, and nationality magazines. Linking Words
Thus
, Linking Words
children
can improve their skills in both their soft and hard skills related to their lessons Use synonyms
such
as sports, public speaking, and interesting things that Linking Words
children
can do perfectly. Use synonyms
Moreover
, parents should supervise and maintain when Linking Words
children
use their Use synonyms
smartphones
to avoid negative aspects.
Use synonyms
However
, technology can bring drawbacks for Linking Words
children
, particularly making Use synonyms
children
unproductive person. The main reason is that Use synonyms
children
are dependent on their gadgets disproportionately Use synonyms
such
as playing games online every day. It can Linking Words
also
have negative effects Linking Words
such
as decreasing productivity and low achievement in their knowledge. Apart from that, If parents cannot maintain every time when their Linking Words
children
are using Use synonyms
smartphones
, they may access negative content. Use synonyms
Therefore
, parents should set boundaries for Linking Words
children
to decrease their time using Use synonyms
smartphones
.
Use synonyms
To conclude
, technology can bring positive and negative impacts on Linking Words
children
based on proportionality. It can be useful when Use synonyms
children
use it to search for a lot of new information. Use synonyms
Otherwise
, it may cause worse personalities for Linking Words
children
because of their dependency on the game online.Use synonyms
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task achievement
The introduction of the essay is clear, but it could be more concise and focused. Mention that the essay will discuss both positive and negative impacts right from the beginning.
task achievement
Provide more specific and varied examples to support your points. For instance, mention a specific educational app or a real-life example of a child's improvement in school because of smartphone use.
coherence and cohesion
Organize the essay more logically by clearly separating the discussion of positive and negative impacts. This will improve the flow and make your argument easier to follow.
coherence and cohesion
Improve the transition between paragraphs. Use cohesive devices like 'Furthermore,' 'On the other hand,' and 'In addition,' to connect ideas smoothly.
task achievement
Ensure that all points mentioned in the introduction are addressed in the body of the essay. If you mention enhancing knowledge and productivity in the introduction, make sure those themes are explored thoroughly.
task achievement
The essay identifies both positive and negative aspects of children using smartphones, which shows a balanced perspective.
coherence and cohesion
The essay is generally well-structured with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion.
task achievement
There is a good attempt to discuss impacts on children's soft and hard skills, which adds depth to the argument.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?