IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

The working week should be shorter and workers should have a longer weekend. Do you agree or disagree?

#week #workers #weekend
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In
this
Linking Words
 jet-set age, with times worth being significantly more compared to an ancient period of life, with everyone working around the clock, chasing their dreams, trying to be the best in
an
Correct article usage
apply
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every
expect
Change the verb form
expects
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 of whatever they do, they somewhat completely ignore their personal life and health. For these reasons being the hot topics around the globe, some people are highly emphasizing
on
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apply
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having a
four
Use synonyms
days
Use synonyms
work
Use synonyms
week
Use synonyms
. My school of thought finds me in a split between both views.  To set the ball rolling, the significance of having
Use synonyms
four
Correct determiner usage
a
show examples
day
Correct your spelling
four-day
show examples
work
Use synonyms
week
Use synonyms
 cycle
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 is that the workers will get extended time to be with their loved ones or to do personal chores.
This
Linking Words
 idea is supposed to make employees more efficient and effective towards their
work
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, increasing chances of having
healthy
Correct article usage
a healthy
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 and happy atmosphere at a
job
Use synonyms
, with these
days
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 to rejuvenate workers are expected to come back to a
job
Use synonyms
 with refreshing ideas and broad mind, which
infact
Correct your spelling
in fact
 can lead to more success for the business.
For example
Linking Words
,hospital
transfers
Fix the agreement mistake
transfer jobs
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job
Use synonyms
 in Canada offer their drivers three
day
Change to a plural noun
days
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,
four
Use synonyms
day
Change to a plural noun
days
show examples
 and five
days
Use synonyms
 working
Use synonyms
week
Fix the agreement mistake
weeks
show examples
 depending on what one is suitable
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
, they can choose
accordingly
Linking Words
. On the dark side, having more time off from
work
Use synonyms
 can lead to employees being less enthusiastic to come back to
work
Use synonyms
,
Linking Words
this
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
 can lead to
less
Correct article usage
a less
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 appreciative and less
focussed
Correct your spelling
focused
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 atmosphere at the offices. In essence, discussing
length
Correct article usage
the length
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about
Change preposition
of
show examples
number
Change the article
a number
the number
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 of working
days
Use synonyms
 in a
week
Use synonyms
, it can be said that to have a balanced environment at a
job
Use synonyms
, an employee should be given a choice to choose their working structure, whether it is five or
four
Use synonyms
days
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by singhrajpreet147 on

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task achievement
Ensure your essay directly addresses the prompt throughout. While you touched upon the pros and cons of a shorter working week, make sure each point clearly supports your argument.
coherence cohesion
Improve the overall logical flow of ideas. Make clear transitions between your points to guide the reader smoothly through your arguments.
task achievement
Strengthen your examples. They should closely relate to your main points and provide concrete evidence supporting your argument.
task achievement
Clarify your stance. Your introduction indicates a split view, but it's important to either agree or disagree clearly and consistently. This will help in structuring your arguments better.
task achievement
You have a strong ability to present multiple perspectives, showing a balanced understanding of the issue.
coherence cohesion
The essay includes an introduction and a conclusion, which are essential parts of a coherent structure.
coherence cohesion
You use varied vocabulary and complex sentence structures, demonstrating a good command of English.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • productivity
  • burnout
  • motivation
  • mental well-being
  • work-life balance
  • job satisfaction
  • pollution levels
  • traffic congestion
  • consumer spending
  • economic implications
  • leisure and service sectors
What to do next:
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