in many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing: Do you think this is a positive or a negative development? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience Write at least 250 words.
Around the globe,
people
are displacing
from villages to modern places and the ratio of Wrong verb form
displaced
people
continuing their lives in rural areas
is becoming low, I think this
should not happen and I will provide relevant arguments related to my claim in the given paragraph.
To commence with rural areas
, in my opinion
villages have their own charm and they are different from modern Add a comma
opinion,
cities
. I found the people
of the village more hardworking as compared to individuals
living in modern areas
. As people
in rural areas
do have not many facilities they perform their tasks in a very enthusiastic way. For instance
Add a comma
,
individuals
in rural areas
are very fit because they get a diet with healthy ingredients and the environment of villages is very healthy to livein
. There is not any kind of pollution in rural Correct your spelling
live in
areas
. Furthermore
, more of the people
of the village have good sleeping routines.
On the other hand
, Some people
argue that modern cities
have more facilities. Modern cities
have viable transportation and cities
also
have reliable educational systems. Individuals
of modern cities
have many opportunities to achieve success and to fulfil their dreams.They have many ways to earn money. For instance
, in cities
, life
of a person becomes very easy. In Add an article
the life
a life
cities
, the mediums of purchasing and selling goods are very accessible. Moreover
, the shopping malls are always open.
To sum up
, there are different points of view of different people
around the globe but i
think Change the capitalization
I
individuals
should stay in rural areas
. Rural areas
have different benefits which cities
don’t have.Submitted by mifzalrizwan2 on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
introduction conclusion present
Your introduction is clear, but the thesis statement could be more concise. Instead of stating 'I think this should not happen,' try to offer a stronger stance on why it is either positive or negative.
logical structure
Ensure each paragraph has a clear main idea and supporting details that stick to that idea. For instance, the second paragraph could be more focused on the benefits of rural living, with a clearer transition to the points about the disadvantages of urban living.
supported main points
Expand upon your examples to make your arguments more compelling. For instance, while you mention that rural areas have healthier diets, you could explain how this affects overall life expectancy or quality of life.
task response
The essay maintains a balanced viewpoint, weighing both the pros and cons of rural and urban living.
coherence cohesion
The language used is clear and easy to understand, making your arguments accessible.
relevant specific examples
The examples provided, such as health benefits in rural areas, are relevant and add value to your arguments.
Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.
‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.
Examples:
I really want to study but I’m too tired.
I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.
If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.
Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+
Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!