Nowadays larger distance are travelled by people to work and study on a daily basis. Some consider it to be a negative development while others disagree. Discuss both views and give your own opinion
In these
days, individuals are travelling longer way in order to receive Change preposition
These
education
or for their profession everyday
as opposed to previous years. Replace the word
every day
While
some people believe that this
is positive, others think that it is not. Even though this
development costs more time and money
, as outcome
will be more beneficial, Add an article
the outcome
this
sacrifice can be made.
As cities have developed massively, transportation became
increasingly difficult. In Wrong verb form
has become
metropols
, especially, people have to waste lots of Correct your spelling
metropolis
money
and time on the way to schools
or Fix the agreement mistake
school
Correct article usage
the workplace
workplace
. The reason is related to pupils' and employees' barely sufficient Fix the agreement mistake
workplaces
economical
power. Correct word choice
economic
Due to
the fact that house rents are utterly pricey in city centers
, citizens had to live Change the spelling
centres
out
of the urban areas. Yet, better Change preposition
outside
education
centers
and Change the spelling
centres
employments
are generally located at the heart of the city. Fix the agreement mistake
employment
For
this
reason, choosing relatively less quality
schools and jobs in order to save Correct your spelling
lower-quality
money
is totally understandable.
However
, education
and worklife
are the most significant parts of people's Correct your spelling
work
life
and so as to reach Fix the agreement mistake
lives
the
better conditions individuals may put Correct article usage
apply
money
in second plan until getting what they deserve. In this
context, every extra miles
gone and each overspent Change to a singular noun
mile
money
can be considered as a price to pay.
Take a beginner white-collar professional, who employed
by Add a missing verb
is employed
massive
company, as an example. If he keeps insisting Add an article
the massive
a massive
working
in the same place despite expenditures, he will Change preposition
on working
can
rise up to superior positions over time. Remove a modal verb
apply
Hence
, in order to obtain achievements, individuals should give up on their comfort.
In conclusion, travelling longer distance
for work and Fix the agreement mistake
distances
education
might be pricey, however
these sacrifices bring Add a comma
however,
better
Correct article usage
a better
carrier
and eventually Correct your spelling
career
better
life.Correct article usage
a better
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grammatical accuracy
Focus on improving grammatical accuracy and reducing redundant word use to ensure clarity and precision in your arguments.
sentence structure
Try to introduce more varied sentence structures to enrich the essay and demonstrate a higher command of the language.
point of view
Remember to maintain a more consistent and clear stance throughout the essay, reinforcing your viewpoint in each paragraph.
introduction
The introduction effectively sets the context and presents both views clearly.
examples
You’ve provided relevant examples, like the white-collar professional, which help to illustrate your points well.
conclusion
The conclusion successfully summarizes the key points and restates your stance clearly.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.