Many young people choose to take a year out between finishing school and starting university in order to gain work experience or to travel. The experience of non-academic life this offers benefits the individual when they return to education. To what extent do you agrede or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience . Write at least 250 words

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Taking a year off between finishing school or college and starting university is a popular choice for young people, especially among European and American undergraduates. Generally, doing so doesn't negatively affect their educational progress.
Moreover
, how
this
time is spent can lead to invaluable experiences before beginning higher education." Looking at the details, a common motive for taking a break from studies is to explore the world.
This
also
allows the scholar to encounter a variety of cultures and sometimes discover opportunities overseas that might not be available in their home country.
Furthermore
, taking time off out can provide practical work experience that enhances a student's resume and makes them more competitive in the job market after graduating from university.
In addition
, a career break can offer a break from academic pressures, allowing students to start university with renewed focus and energy."
On the other hand
, there are certain cons to taking a hiatus. Some argue that taking a year off to rest might lead to a loss of academic momentum and make the transition back to academic life more challenging.
Additionally
, there is a risk that skipping one academic career break could turn into a prolonged break from studies, making it harder for pupils to return.
As a result
, non-academic life might disrupt well-planned futures if appealing job offers or additional travel opportunities arise.
To sum up
, even though some individuals argue that taking a sabbatical year can lead to a loss of academic momentum, it can offer broad-based benefits for students."
Submitted by shahobhozratkulov on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

introduction conclusion present
You provided a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps in framing your argument. However, the introduction could be stronger by stating a clear stance on whether you agree or disagree with the statement, rather than just presenting general information.
relevant specific examples
Although you covered both sides of the argument, some points could be further developed. For example, providing specific examples from personal experience or knowledge would strengthen your essay. Including more concrete examples can help to clarify your points and make your argument more convincing.
complete response
The essay addresses the task but could benefit from a clearer thesis statement and more thorough exploration of the points raised. To achieve a more complete response, specifically address how the year off benefits or hinders students when they return to education rather than focusing on pre-university advantages.
logical structure
Some parts of the essay lack logical transitions, making it slightly difficult to follow the progression of your ideas. Work on transitioning smoothly between points to improve cohesion.
introduction conclusion present
Your essay includes a logical introduction and conclusion, providing a solid structure for your argument.
clear comprehensive ideas
The ideas presented are clear and cover the main aspects of the topic, showcasing a comprehensive understanding.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: