Some people believe that the biggest problem facing cities is the increasing number of cars. Others say there more serious problems. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

As the scope of the development in urban areas improves, there will be a lot of issues created. Few people assume that
this
is caused by an
increase
in the number of
cars
.
While
others believe that there are various other aspects causing issues in the cities.
This
essay discusses both views,
while
I believe there are other serious problems which are contributing more than an
increase
in the car
count
. The main problem caused by using
cars
is traffic congestion. As the
count
of
cars
rises, leading to the traffic situation
also
rises.
Secondly
,
this
would
also
lead to air pollution. The amount of carbon dioxide and other toxic gases pollute the environment which causes breathing problems like asthma. As a matter of fact, the
increase
in car
count
is not only the major problem. There are other aspects too.
Firstly
, poor infrastructure management by the municipality, increasing rate of unemployment
due to
high competition, lack of hygiene maintenance over the street food, food adulteration, and spike in building up slums
due to
shortage of houses for the lower-class people. In my opinion, the above facts are the major concerns when compared to the
increase
in car
count
.
For instance
, an
increase
in the unemployment rate led youths to wrongdoings in order to fulfil their desires and family needs. Lack of infrastructure management causes traffic congestion, and floods during heavy rain or cyclone.
To conclude
,
although
an
increase
in the number of
cars
causes problems,
this
is not the biggest threat to the city. There are various issues which are discussed above concern more than
this
.
Submitted by nlchiranth11 on

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coherence cohesion
While the introduction and conclusion are clear, make sure the body paragraphs are well-structured with clear topic sentences. This will enhance logical flow.
task achievement
Some of the points made are relevant but lack specific examples or detailed explanations that strengthen the argument. Try to include more specific instances or data.
task achievement
Avoid generalizations and ensure each point is elaborated with depth so the reader can understand the nuance of your argument.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, demonstrating good organization.
task achievement
You have addressed both sides of the argument, which shows a balanced approach.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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