In some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. Why might be the case? Do you think this is a positve or negative situation?

New days,having a
home
instead
of renting,
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
is
a
Change the article
apply
show examples
necessary in
this
statement . It is a positive way to
reaching to stable
Replace the word
reach stability
show examples
.
This
good sign for society. In my opinion, paying
home
it is a positive situation. In
this
essay
Add a comma
essay,
show examples
we talk about
what
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
the reason
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
having your
home
and
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
what
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
the result in the nation and why
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
renting it is a negative thing.
In
Change preposition
On
show examples
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
one hand , paying
home
it is a
depend
Correct subject-verb agreement
depends
show examples
of
Change preposition
on
show examples
person
Correct article usage
the person
show examples
, because some
people
love going to
another cities
Replace the adjective
another city
other cities
show examples
, or
people
living
Wrong verb form
live
show examples
in another city for work or study. In
this
situation, I prefer
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
renting, because you want
moving
Change the verb form
to move
show examples
to your hometown or
an
Add a missing verb
have an
show examples
opportunity
In
Change preposition
To
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work .
Addition
Change preposition
In addition
show examples
you want to have
home
Add an article
a home
show examples
, but you cannot because you have
a financial obligations
Correct the article-noun agreement
financial obligations
a financial obligation
show examples
.
Correct your spelling
Moreover
show examples
More over
Correct your spelling
Moreover
show examples
other
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
you need to
stable
Add a missing verb
be stable
show examples
firstly
Change the word
first
show examples
and
then
can
having
Wrong verb form
have your
show examples
own
home
, There are many reasons
to
Rephrase
why to
show examples
can't pay
home
, but all
people
love
Correct your spelling
having
show examples
haveing
Correct your spelling
having
show examples
home
Correct article usage
a home
show examples
in their city
beside
Replace the word
besides
show examples
that
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
countries need
people
to pay
home
,
for example
Italy sell
home
in a small town in a one dollar And
another
Correct determiner usage
the
show examples
hand
Correct word choice
other hand
show examples
,
as a result
for can't
Verb problem
of not
show examples
paying
home
, you cannot
stable
Add a missing verb
be stable
show examples
and comfortable. Why because renting
reflect
Correct subject-verb agreement
reflects
show examples
the financial situation or
communicate
Replace the word
communication
show examples
. When
majority
Correct article usage
the majority
show examples
not
having
Wrong verb form
have their
show examples
own
home
, obviously that
financial is
Wrong verb form
finances
show examples
a down because
people
not having own
home
,
also
the countries need all the
people
have
Add the particle
to have
show examples
a
home
By way
for
Change preposition
of
show examples
conclusion
Add an article
the conclusion
a conclusion
show examples
that
Change preposition
if
show examples
all you need
home
or
renting
Wrong verb form
rent
show examples
, it is all good. They're over having
home
Add an article
a home
show examples
. Necessary two to
Your self
Correct your spelling
Yourself
show examples
your children and your country
Submitted by dana31m7 on

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coherence cues
Your essay needs a clearer structure with distinct paragraphs for introduction, body, and conclusion. Ensure each paragraph has one main idea, and develop it fully.
task achievement
Provide more specific examples or evidence to support your main points. This will strengthen your argument and make it more convincing.
language accuracy
Be careful with language accuracy. While small errors are acceptable, some of the inaccuracies in your essay can hinder comprehension. Try to use more precise language and correct grammar.
task achievement
It's clear that you understand the importance of owning a home and how it affects stability.
task achievement
You have made a good attempt to provide both sides of the argument—owning versus renting a home.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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