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Writing Samples /
Band 5

The chart shows information about various professions in the UK and their salaries. The table shows the average working hours per week for each profession.

The chart shows information about various professions in the UK and their salaries. The table shows the average working hours per week for each profession.
#information #professions #uk #salaries #hours #week #profession
The graph illustrates some data about different jobs in the UK and their wages and
table
Correct article usage
the table
show examples
 displays
average
Correct article usage
the average
show examples
 working
hours
 in one
week
by
Change preposition
for
show examples
 several professions.  All in all, 
underground
Add an article
the underground
an underground
show examples
driver
Replace the word
driving
show examples
 is the
most high
Change the adjective
highest
show examples
payed
Correct your spelling
paid
show examples
job
 among all professions.
However
, teachers and firefighters
general
Change the word
generally
show examples
 have more working
hours
 than others.
Firstly
, 
underground
Add an article
the underground
an underground
show examples
 driver can get almost 50000 pounds and
this
 type of
works
Fix the agreement mistake
work
show examples
 does not depend on experience.
Moreover
, other categories
such
 as teachers, police and firefighter have salaries in range from 20000 to 40000 $. To compare,
teaching
Correct article usage
a teaching
show examples
job
 and
firefighter
Correct article usage
a firefighter
show examples
job
 spend 55
hours
 per
week
 to work.
Secondly
, in
UK
Correct article usage
the UK
show examples
 underground drivers
have used
Wrong verb form
spend
show examples
 only 36
hours
 per
week
to do
Change the verb form
doing
show examples
 their
job
, but they
got
Wrong verb form
get
show examples
 the
most high
Change the adjective
highest
show examples
check
Fix the agreement mistake
checks
show examples
. Nurses and police give 38-40 average
hours
 in one
week
.
In addition
 to it, professors and firefighters reach almost 55
hours
 weekly.
Submitted by olqa.zvereva01 on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
▼
Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Basic structure: Change the second paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words hours, week, job with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "almost" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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