Some people believe that schoolchildren should be made to wear a uniform. Others feel that children should be free to choose their own clothes. Discuss both sides of the argument. Do you agree or disagree with pupils wearing uniforms?

The issue of dressing in uniform at
school
has sparked considerable debate in recent times.
While
some people argue that
students
must be in uniform, others maintain that they should have the freedom to choose their own attire. In my opinion, I totally agree with the subsequent perspective.
This
essay will explore both sides of the argument before reaching a conclusion. On the one hand, there are some arguments in favour of the idea that schoolchildren should be made to wear a uniform.
To begin
with,
uniforms
can promote a sense of discipline and unity, fostering a more focused learning environment.
Uniforms
can foster a sense of belonging and community among
students
.
As a result
,
this
can lead to increased
school
spirit and a more positive learning environment.
Furthermore
,
uniforms
can help to identify
students
on
school
grounds, potentially improving safety measures.
For example
, during emergencies
such
as lockdowns or active shooter situations,
uniforms
can help
school
staff and law enforcement quickly identify
students
and distinguish them from intruders.
This
can expedite response times and potentially save lives.
On the other hand
, there are several reasons to support the statement that children should be free to choose their own clothes.
Initially
,
uniforms
may not always be comfortable or practical for
students
, especially in different weather conditions.
Uniforms
made of heavy fabrics or dark
colors
Change the spelling
colours
show examples
can be extremely hot and uncomfortable in warm climates.
Consequently
,
this
can make it difficult for
students
to concentrate and learn effectively. Another reason would be that
while
uniforms
may be cost-effective in the long run, the initial cost of purchasing them can be a burden for some families.
For instance
, many schools require
students
to have multiple sets of
uniforms
, especially for those participating in physical activities or extracurriculars.
This
can significantly increase the initial cost. All in all, the facts mentioned above have created a dilemma when people evaluate the effects of
this
issue, and it has still sparked controversy in recent years. As far as I am concerned, I put more emphasis on the idea that children should be afforded the autonomy to select their own attire. People should have
further
consideration on
this
issue.
Submitted by mgnm140307 on

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task achievement
You have covered both sides of the argument well and provided a clear point of view with supporting reasons. However, to achieve a higher score, try to include even more specific examples and details to strengthen your arguments.
coherence cohesion
While your essay has a good logical structure and clear paragraphs, consider using more linking words and phrases to enhance the cohesion between sentences and paragraphs.
introduction conclusion
Your introduction effectively sets the stage for the discussion, and your conclusion nicely encapsulates your viewpoint, providing a clear ending to the essay.
supported main points
You have effectively supported your main points with logical reasoning and examples, which strengthens your argument.

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